Memories on the Lake
by SpellboundMist
Summary: Jiya is dead. Misao realizes that she is not the only one that is vastly affected by this loss. She finds comfort and understanding in the one person she least expected it from. Is this just a matter of family, or is it true love? AxM AU Modern time.
1. Slipped Away

Notes: Here's my second fic! –is excited- This was originally intended to be a one-shot but I decided I wanted to put more into it so now its long. Hopefully not too long. There isn't much AxM at the beginning, but it will come, I promise.

Just so you don't get confused, Misao is 18, Omasu (24) and Okon (21) are sisters and Misao's cousins, and Aoshi (23) is living with them. You'll find out more when you read.

xxXxxCHAPTER 1xxXxx

The phone rang. Eighteen-year-old Misao rolled over in bed and pulled her blanket over her ears, hoping to muffle the sound. The phone rang a second time, piercing right through the fabric to the girl's sleep-clouded ears. Misao sat up irritably, rubbing her eyes. She glowered at the digital clock on her night table, the neon green digits showing 3:37am. The phone was still ringing.

"Omasuuuuuuu!" Misao called, her voice a bit raspy from sleep. She staggered to the door and yanked it open. "Omasu! Answer the damn phone!" She waited, counting the seconds. The phone didn't ring again. Satisfied, she retreated into her room and sank gratefully back into bed.

She had just about fallen asleep again when a ragged cry came to her ears. She curled up in a ball and pulled her pillow over her head, trying to block it out. The door beside hers banged open and Okon's slippered feet shuffled hurriedly down the hall. Then everything was silent.

Misao's eyes shot open in the dark. She tensed as apprehension filled her without warning or reason. Her stomach clenched into a quivering knot. She couldn't breathe. Throwing the pillow off her head with a gasp, Misao sat straight up in bed. She felt cold. Something was wrong.

As she got out of bed for the second time, Misao felt goosebumps prickle over her arms. Looking around her messy room, she grabbed a carelessly discarded sweater off a pile and pulled it on over her thin nightgown. Then she located her fluffy slippers, the ones with the kitties on them, and slipped her feet into them. She walked to the door slowly, her eyes fixed on the thin line of light outlining the dark shape of her bedroom door. All manner of scenarios flashed through her mind, from horror movies to sci-fi novels, from stalkers to serial killers. Clenching her fist, she opened the door.

Squinting against the sudden light of the hallway, Misao stumbled a bit as she headed down the hall. She could hear the sound of quiet sobbing. _Oh no,_ she thought, quickening her steps. A door opened behind her, and she knew without looking that it was the one right at the end of the hall. Somebody fell into step behind her. She cast a glance over her shoulder, her blue eyes flashing with all her jumbled up emotions.

Shinomori Aoshi was almost two heads taller than the petite Misao. Five years older than her at 23 years old, he had been a constant in her life since she was a small child. In fact, she could hardly remember a time when he had not been there, either taking care of her when she was younger or just being a mysterious and alluring presence. The girl smiled in spite of herself at the memory of looking up into those azure eyes, warming slightly, just for her. Come to think of it, she had never found out how he came to be living with them, just that he was not part of their family.

As she grew older, they had become more and more distant to each other. Misao had always thought he was more than a little good-looking, but any feelings for him had long been passed off as childhood infatuation and pushed to the back of her mind. Just last year, she had broken up with the kind, smiling Soujiro, a boy who had been her classmate since middle school. Shinomori Aoshi was just too distant, mysterious, and _silent_ for Misao's preference, no matter how hot he was.

"So…you heard it too?" Misao asked as the two of them reached the top of the stairs. She was surprised to hear her voice trembling ever so slightly. She turned to look at her former guardian and caretaker, and caught his slight nod. "I wonder…" Misao bit her lip and stopped. Shaking her head, she turned and started down the stairs.

On the first step down, Misao froze. Aoshi had caught her hand in his, squeezing it gently. Misao's other hand gripped the wooden banister tightly; she could feel the edges digging into her palm. What did this mean? For a few years now, the two of them had shared nothing but polite greetings and --- mostly on Misao's part --- a few smiles.

Before her unexpected blush could warm her chilled limbs, Aoshi released her hand. Misao turned to look at him and saw a strange expression in his eyes. Refocusing her mind, with a bit of effort, she led the way down the stairs.

Once downstairs, Misao hurtled into the living room, following the sounds of ragged sobbing. Omasu was in a crumpled heap on the floor, her shoulders shuddering violently as she cried. The table beside her was covered with paper and books; Omasu had just started her final year of law school. Misao could see Okon just putting down the phone in the kitchen.

Both girls were kneeling beside Omasu trying to calm her down when Aoshi walked into the room, his face looking as though it were carved from stone. Misao noted that he still had that odd look in his eyes. Long strides took him to Omasu's side in seconds. The two girls beside her drew away slightly as he half-knelt before Omasu. Taking her chin with his fingers, he lifted her tear-stained face and looked into her eyes. Omasu visibly relaxed and her sobs ceased. Closing her eyes with a deep sigh, she slumped into Okon's waiting arms as Aoshi released her.

Standing up to his full height, the tall man headed into the kitchen. Misao glanced after him and saw him take a box out of the cupboard; Jiya's favorite tea. Aoshi normally never drank that kind but Misao didn't have time to wonder because Okon murmured her name.

"Come on, lets all get off the floor," Okon put her arm around her sister and helped her up. Misao followed them to the couch and sat down on the other side of Omasu. They sat in a tense silence for a while, the only sound being those of Aoshi preparing tea in the kitchen.

Twenty-one year old Okon had just finished a college course in accounting last year. Her long hair was still messy from sleep and hung about her face, framing tear-filled brown eyes. Her twenty-four year old sister's eyes were identical to hers but were red from crying and shadowed by lack of sleep. Omasu was a diligent worker and brilliant student, looking to graduate this year as a lawyer.

"Jiya…" Omasu spoke for the first time. Her voice was too calm, and sounded hollow. "He's gone."

"He passed away about half an hour ago," Okon finished quietly, with a worried glance for Misao. Her cousin stared at her in shock, as if unable to interpret her words.

_No way…_Misao let out a breath that she did not know she had been holding. _He was just sick; he was supposed to get better._ As a feeling of numbness spread through her body, she flopped back on the couch. Tilting her head back against the soft cushions, Misao drew a shaky breath. She closed her eyes, but the tears leaked through anyway.

"Here"

Misao wiped her sleeve across her wet eyes and accepted the cup of hot tea that Aoshi handed her. Taking a sip, she sighed.

"You ok, Misao-chan?" Okon's voice floated through a bleary haze. She felt herself nod. _Jiya had always bounced her on his knee when she was a little girl. He always laughed when she pulled at his short beard._

"They told me how he died. Lung cancer is a terrible thing," Okon was saying. _Jiya always smelled like mothballs and jasmine flowers_. "It----perhaps it's best if I didn't tell you. Unless…you want to know? It's your choice Misao."

_Jiya liked lilies and pink ribbons. Misao had always worn one in her hair-----just for him----before she turned 12 and decided she was too old._ "Mmm…" she made a non-committal sound for Okon's sake. _Jiya had always like Classical music too_.

"The hospital said-------it must have been painful for him." Okon's voice was shaking. _Misao could remember when he had taken her and her two cousins to see La Boheme when she was still too young to understand it. She had been six, Okon nine, and Omasu 12. _

"He spent the entire night before he died----struggling to breath. He tried to talk, to tell them something, but nobody could make out what he was saying. And then he just-----" Okon's voice choked off as she burst into tears.

"-----Shuddered and died." Omasu finished bleakly, appearing already beyond tears. _Jiya liked to paint. He enjoyed Impressionist art, and they always joked that it was because his eyes were so bad everything seemed blurry and vague anyways. _Misao could hear her Omasu and Okon comforting each other. Aoshi was kneeling on the floor in front of them with his own cup of tea.

"Are you even listening, Misao?" Okon sounded close to hysteria, "What's wrong with you! Aren't you upset that he's gone? Jiya's dead, Misao! And he's never coming home from that damn hospital! Don't you care?" Omasu's tears had returned and she sobbed as she clutched at Okon's arm, trying to keep her from attacking their cousin.

_How dare they,_ Misao's mind cleared all of a sudden and everything rushed in on her. Omasu's grip slipped and Okon lunged at Misao in a frenzy of grief and frustration. With a cry, Misao leaped off the couch, tumbling to the floor beside Aoshi. She could feel the tea she had spilled seeping through her nightgown, burning her skin. Jerking her leg away, she watched the wet spot on the floor grow bigger and bigger. Okon was picking herself up and appeared to be getting ready for a second attack.

That was it. Misao's numbness shattered like glass and she gave a scream as reality engulfed her and her tears came hard and fast. Leaping to her feet, she hurled herself out of the room and stumbled blindly up the stairs. She fell twice, bruising her knees. She couldn't feel the pain though, and she burst into her own room, slamming the door shut.

Once inside, Misao threw herself onto her bed and cried. She could hear her own blood roaring in her ears. Rolling off the bed, she hit the floor with a crash, relishing the physical pain that did little to balance the pain inside her._ Jiya had always liked eating sweets and Omasu used to continuously lecture him about his dental health._

She was suffocating. Her room was too hot and she couldn't breathe. Her head spinning, Misao ripped her sweater off and threw it on the ground_. Jiya had been a skilled surgeon in his youth._ It was still stifling. Misao crossed the room and flung her window open.

Cool night air rushed in, drying the sweat and tears on her face. _Jiya had been a chain smoker too, using cigarettes as a way to relieve stress. _A dog barked somewhere in the neighborhood. _Jiya's addiction had taken his wife, a grandmother Misao and Okon had never known. Omasu described her as a plump, smiling woman with curly hair. _

The moon was full, casting a chilly blue hue over everything. _Jiya liked to lie out in the yard and watch the stars. Sometimes, he would catch butterflies for Misao and her cousin. Even Omasu wasn't too old for that. _The wind picked up, raising goose bumps on Misao's bare arms. Closing her window-----the room was cool now-----Misao turned and, after tossing a t-shirt and belt onto her bead behind her, plunked down on her chair.

Tears that had been temporarily banished returned, softer now. Misao reached down and picked up a teddy bear that had fallen with her earlier. Hugging it to her chest, she buried her face in the furry head and wept brokenly. _Jiya had quit smoking as soon as his wife was diagnosed with lung cancer from second-hand smoke. It was too late. Misao could remember the day when her weeping grandfather had taken her in his arms and whispered, "You have her eyes, child. She lives on."_

Her bedroom door opened softly. Misao didn't lift her head, thinking that it was probably one of her cousins; Omasu or Okon probably wanted to comfort her. She was wrong. A warm hand came to rest on her head, ruffling her hair; a familiar gesture from her childhood. Firmly but gently, Misao's head was tilted up until she was looking into Aoshi's eyes.

When teary ocean-blue eyes locked with icy blue-green ones, Misao let out a gasp. _This is what Omasu saw_, Misao realized. In the tall man's eyes, there was the calm serenity of one who had looked at fate and accepted without a word. However, underneath the unruffled surface, something was hastily gathering up shreds of loss and anguish to hide them away.

Misao remembered how Aoshi had taken her hand earlier, before they went downstairs. Now she understood. He had known all along. She stopped crying and sank into a mute acceptance.

"Good," Aoshi murmured in a low voice, "Please don't cry any more, Misao. I…I could hardly bear it." Misao couldn't help staring at him. Those words held more emotion that she had seen him express in the past few months. All put together. Times ten. His normally stoic face softened into something that hinted of sorrow and desolation. For an instant, Misao could have sworn that Aoshi's eyes had been seeking consolation and comfort, even as he brushed the tears from her cheeks. Before she could confirm her suspicions, the stony mask returned and Aoshi dropped his hand.

Letting out a long breath, Misao numbly picked her hairbrush out of a pile of other things on her desk and began teasing the tangles out of her long hair. It was a repetitive task, helping keep her mind clear. To her surprise, Aoshi began to pick up her discarded clothing off the floor and furniture where they were scattered. Perhaps he, too, needed a tedious task to occupy his hands and clear his mind. Misao watched as he folded her shirts and jeans, feeling faintly amused when her Hello Kitty bra fell out of a pile of shirts. Aoshi placed it off to one side, as if not knowing what to do with it.

"I watched my family die," Aoshi surprised Misao-----for about the fifth time that evening-----by speaking first. "My mother took her last breath in my arms. She had a weak heart; it ran in the family and orphaned her at twelve years old. My father threw himself off our tenth-floor apartment balcony two weeks after her funeral." Misao saw a muscle twitch in his jaw. Aoshi put down the shirt he had been folding and clenched his fists.

"I was the middle child of three," Aoshi continued, not noticing Misao's shocked but sympathetic eyes. "Hannya was three years older than me, and Beshimi two years younger. When my father died, I was six and Hannya was nine. I was holding Beshimi's hand during the funeral. He didn't even cry, but Hannya did. They covered up the casket too, because they didn't want us to see Father's body."

Misao held back a gasp at this. She had never known about Aoshi's past, because it always seemed inappropriate to ask. She finished brushing her hair, and curled it up to form a messy bun at the back of her head. Her clock read 4:56am.

"My father had made arrangements for the three of us to be taken care of by his best friend---your father." Aoshi seated himself on Misao's bed. He was now facing her, but he seemed to stare right through her. "When we came to this house, we were alone and scared. Makimachi-san and his wife were very kind to us. You were just a baby then. I remember the first time I saw your eyes---" His voice broke off.

"Hannya-kun…I remember him," Misao suddenly said. "And Beshimi-kun too." She smiled to herself, musing. Then her face fell. "There were two others. I can't remember their faces now."

"Shikijo and Hyottoko," Aoshi told her tersely, "Hannya's classmates. The five of us were always together. And I am the only one still alive today."

Misao's lip trembled. Long forgotten memories from her childhood came flooding back. She opened her mouth to say something, but Aoshi stood up abruptly. He patted her head rather absently, as if she were still a kid.

"Get some sleep. Will you go to school tomorrow?" Seeing her nod, he continued, "I'll come and wake you up. You can eat breakfast in the car; I'll drive you." Before Misao could respond, he turned and left the room, closing the door behind him.

Dazedly, Misao moved the neat piles of clothes Aoshi had created and lay down on her bed. Suddenly realizing how tired she was, Misao closed her weary eyes and curled up in a little ball to sleep.

xxxXxxx

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

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	2. All Is Numb

Notes: Here we go. Sorry about the last chapter, I realized that the characters weren't introduced very well. Lots of things will be cleared up in this chapter, I hope…Haha and basically no AxM at all in this chapter. So so sorry, I promise there will be some coming. Please bear with me. Like one of the reviews said, this should probably end up being a long fic. I'll make sure everything gets explained before it drags out too much.

Oh, and I'll be updating these chapters in pretty close succession because I'm writing it almost constantly. I don't know if that's good or bad. I almost got it confiscated today in school. ) I'm so devoted! –is very proud of self-

xxXxxCHAPTER 2xxXxx

_Through a thick fog, someone was calling her name. _

"_Misao-chan!"_

_Looking up, Misao saw four semi-familiar people looking at her. All of them were adults, despite Misao's muddled memories._

_One of them was taller even than Aoshi, his blocky head topped by a patch of spiked hair. His buckteeth showed as he grinned widely at Misao. The man beside him was muscular, his long hair drawn back in a ponytail. His smile was a bit out of place on a face covered by scars. Another man with the same build as Aoshi stood a little to the side, any smile he might have had obscured by a mask Misao remembered it as well as she remembered his hidden face. In front of him was a shorter man with mischievous eyes and his hair gelled up. He waved at Misao._

_Misao ran towards them, happily calling, "Hannya-kun! Shikijo-kun! Beshimi-kun! Hyottoko-kun!" Laughing, she hurtled towards Hannya's open arms. Suddenly, she realized that they were not there anymore, Hannya's white mask winking out of sight before her. With a broken cry, Misao fell to the ground and began to cry. Everybody was gone. She was alone._

"_Don't cry, my pretty Misao-chan," Jiya's voice floated out of the darkness. She thought she felt her grandfather's presence. Looking up hopefully, she watched a glowing light surround her before fading away, like her childhood friends had. _

"_No…" Misao whispered to the darkness, "Don't leave me here alone, please…" Hugging her knees to her chest, Misao cried. The darkness around her twisted and writhed into sickeningly tangible forms, clutching at her with icy fingers._

"_Stop crying Misao," a deep, familiar voice came to her, wrenching her already bleeding heart. "Please Misao." The voice dropped to a pleading, broken whisper. Misao lashed out with sudden anger, feeling her fists hit something hard. An invisible hand was wiping her tears off her face. _

"_Go away," Misao moaned. Her wrists were being held firmly. Struggling to free herself, she twisted and flailed. Then suddenly she was released. Sobbing, she tried to scramble away, but warm arms came around her, locking her against a firm and reassuring chest. Trembling, Misao gave in and relaxed. It was Aoshi's voice that she heard, whispering gentle words into her ear. _

"Misao."

"Nnnn…"

"Misao, wake up."

"Nnnn….don't wanna."

"Are you going to school or not? You're going to be late."

"Ahh!" Misao's eyes snapped open. It took her a moment to realize where she was, and when she did, she immediately blushed. She was half-sittng on her bed, leaning against Aoshi's chest. He had his arms around her, looking as though it were nothing out of the ordinary.

"Ehh, sorry," Misao muttered, making as if to move. To her surprise, Aoshi pulled her in tighter and pressed his lips to her hair.

"Just a little while longer, perhaps," He said. She relented. After a few minutes, she was beginning to feel more comfortable, but Aoshi let his arms fall. Misao took the cue and got up, clambering off her bed.

As she sorted through a pile of t-shirts and selected a light blue one with butterflies on it, she saw Aoshi rise to sit on the edge of her bed. He started to stand but she put up a hand to stop him.

"It's alright, please stay," At his raised eyebrow, she told him, "Just sit on the bed and turn around." He gave a slight smirk and obeyed. Misao grabbed a pair of jeans and proceeded to change out of her pajamas.

"I'm done," She announced, "I'm going to wash up." Without waiting for a reply, she headed for the washroom down the hall.

When Misao returned to her room after washing up, Aoshi had gone. Quickly, she made sure she had everything in her bag for school, checked her appearance in her mirror, and hurried downstairs with her backpack. Aoshi was waiting for her in the kitchen. As she put on a light jacket against the September morning's chill, Aoshi slipped her lunchbox into her bag for her.

"Oh, thanks," Misao said, a little awkwardly.

"Let's go," Aoshi headed for the door, car keys in hand. He was dressed in black pants and a loose blue t-shirt. He carried a black and white windbreaker over his arm. Misao hurried after him, jamming her feet into her shoes hurriedly.

The car Aoshi usually drove was a silver Corolla. Jiya had bought it for him when he first got his license. Misao dumped her bag into the back seat and hopped in beside Aoshi in the front. He put the key in and waited for Misao to buckle up, then handed her a plastic container.

"Breakfast," He said simply, backing the car onto the street. Misao realized how hungry she was. Last night's dinner seemed so long ago. Opening the box, she found two plump rice balls. Grinning, she blurted a quick thank you before wolfing them down. Aoshi allowed himself a miniscule smile.

When Misao had finished, she placed the plastic container on the seat behind her and shifted to sit more comfortably. Aoshi appeared to be staring intently at the road ahead. Misao said nothing, but took the chance to observe him carefully.

_Oh wow, _she thought, _he really is hot._ Aoshi's profile was outlined perfectly by the bright sky through the window. Misao wondered if he knew she was staring at him. Pulling her eyes away, she turned her head and stared out her own window.

Misao remembered the tall, quiet Hannya, eight years older than her. He was much like Aoshi in both build and character. He used to carry her on his shoulders, wearing that grotesque mask he had loved so much. Misao remembered Beshimi too, three years older than her and a natural-born trickster. The two of them had spent endless hours thinking up new pranks to play on the older boys.

Frowning, Misao tried to remember the other two faces, Hyottoko and Shikijo. All she came up with was a bucktoothed grin and scar-riddled skin. Strangely, Misao felt a sense of loss that she couldn't remember them.

"Misao," Aoshi's voice brought her out of her reverie. "Get ready to go."

Startled, Misao realized that Aoshi was slowing the car in approach to the school building. "I'll just let you off here, ok?" Aoshi was saying as he stopped the car.

"Sure, uh thanks," Misao said quietly, "For…everything." For an instant, their eyes met. Then Misao hopped out of the car, got her bag from the back seat, and stepped away. Aoshi raised a hand in response to her wave and drove away.

"Misao-chan!" Kaoru was waving and running across the schoolyard towards her. Misao went to meet her and laughed when they nearly collided. Laughter felt good just then.

The other girl had her blue-black hair up in its usual ponytail and was already in her school uniform. The white blouse with the school logo embroidered on the breast fit Kaoru loosely; she was always concerned about her body image. For the same reason, her plain blue skirt had been tailored to end just below her knees. Black leather shoes made her an extra half-inch taller than the seven inches she already stood over Misao. The two of them had been friends since middle school.

"Whoa…are you okay?" Kaoru was peering at Misao's red eyes concernedly. "What happened?" Misao wasn't sure if it was a good or bad thing that Kaoru could always tell when something was up with her best friend of almost six years.

"Yeah, I'm fine right now. But I got like three hours of sleep last night," Misao told her friend wearily, rubbing her eyes.

"Don't rub," Kaoru pushed Misao's hand away with a patronizing look, "You'll make your eyes even redder than they already are. So…what's going on?" Before Misao could reply, they were both pushed from behind.

"Hey, ladies!" The two of them stumbled and turned to see a grinning Sagara Sanosuke. Grinning, he gave them a thumbs-up before running a hand through his spiky hair. His grin faded when Kaoru's look darkened.

"Why did you push me, you punk?" Kaoru hissed, "I was having an important conversation with Misao, you know. Geez, now I've totally lost my train of thought." Scowling, she took a step toward Sano, "Y'know, I really ought to kill you, Rooster."

"Eh? Me? Push you?" Sano had assumed an innocent look and had his hands up in the air. "Why would I do something like that?" He looked around quickly, taking a step back from Kaoru's menacing approach. "It _so_ wasn't me. It was uh…him!" He pointed behind Kaoru with a goofy grin. "Your little lover-boy!" Kaoru whipped around at this, while Sano winked at Misao.

"Morning, everyone," the red-haired Himura Kenshin said pleasantly, effectively erasing Kaoru's murderous mood with his mere presence. Everybody returned their good mornings, and normal conversation started up. When the bell rang, Misao rushed inside, followed by Kaoru.

The two of them headed to the change rooms so Misao could get her uniform on before class started. There were a handful of other girls there, all rushing to change. Misao was one of a small number that truly disliked wearing skirts. A few years ago, the school gave them permission to come with normal clothes, as long as they had uniforms on during the day. That way, they could change and leave school with regular attire.

As Misao pulled her blue skirt on, Kaoru took the chance to continue the conversation that had been interrupted earlier. With a sigh, Misao spilled her story out quietly to her friend. She left out the parts about Aoshi. For some reason, she was unwilling to share it with anybody, not even Kaoru.

"Okay, I'm ready. Let's go, or we'll be late." Misao grabbed her bag and pushed Kaoru out of the emptying change room. They made it to their grade 12 classroom with about three minutes to spare. Taking her seat beside Kaoru, Misao fought off a yawn and took her books out for her first class.

xxx

By the end of the day, Misao was thoroughly exhausted. She and Kaoru were in the change rooms again, changing for their last class: PE. Misao yawned as she put on pants and a t-shirt, both with the school logo on them. Kaoru poked her in the side and gave her an encouraging smile, which Misao returned wearily.

The class lined up outside on the field. Their usual teacher was away and they had a substitute. He was an old man, and told them to choose and organize whatever they wanted to do since he hadn't been left with a lesson plan. Glad for a break from track sports----she really didn't feel up to it----Misao raised her hand with the others to vote for dodgeball.

The teacher provided soft spongy balls to prevent injury, and sat back to watch them play. They picked teams and Misao ended up with Soujiro, her ex-boyfriend. He smiled at her, as usual. They had kept up a good friendship even after their break-up. Misao's team won all three games they played.

After class, Misao changed back into her regular jeans and t-shirt before following Kaoru outside. Kenshin and Sano were waiting for them.

"Over here!" Sano called across the foyer. Everybody within ten meters turned and stared at him. Unabashed, Sano swung a thumbs-up around for all the other students, his usual spunky smile on his face. Misao and Kaoru rolled their eyes and slipped through the crowd toward the two guys.

"You idiot!" Misao playfully punched Sano's arm. "What's with you and beggin for attention? Megumi's not giving you enough?" She ducked behind Kenshin as Sano swung a fist at her. Sticking her tongue out, she danced out of the way of Sano's attempted blows. Laughing, the four of them walked toward the parking lot.

"I'm going to pick up Megumi-chan," Sano announced, getting into his car, "You three go on, we'll meet there." Without another word, he slammed his door shut and drove off, obviously eager to see his girlfriend.

"I guess I'm driving you two then," Kenshin stated placidly. Unlocking the door, he helped the girls pile their things into the trunk. Kaoru sat in the passenger seat beside Kenshin while Misao plopped into the back seat. Yawning, she leaned her head against the window.

"Why don't you take a nap? I need to stop for gas first anyways," Kenshin told her as he started the car. Misao smiled and thanked him as she put on her seat belt. Closing her eyes, her last thought was on a nice hot cup of coffee.

Misao and her friends usually went to a cozy little Western-style café after school. It was owned by Kenshin's cousin, Tae, and she always treated them to drinks or fresh-baked delicacies. The four of them, plus Megumi, had spent countless afternoons there, laughing or crying or talking or just doing homework.

"Hey, Misao," Kenshin's voice woke her, "We're here. Sano and Megumi are waiting." Rubbing her eyes, Misao sat up, unbuckled her seat belt, and got out of the car. She followed Kaoru and Kenshin over to the familiar little café. True enough, Sano was already standing there, with his arm around Megumi.

"Hello Misao-chan," Megumi called out as they neared. Misao had always thought Sano's girlfriend was quite beautiful. The couple had met in a summer school two years ago. Sano had been taking a course to raise his marks in school, while Megumi was taking an extra course for her own knowledge. She was already a gifted student, and was looking towards getting a medical degree in university.

As the usual chatter rose among the five, Misao went ahead to push the door open. A faint tinkling sound came from above them and a rich aroma of coffee and baking swirled out to greet them. Misao smiled and held the door open for her friends before following them into the comforting atmosphere.

The walls were painted with curling ivy and small birds sitting among the leaves. The windows around the room were covered by blinds that let through a muted greenish light. Tables were placed around the room in little clusters, all of them tucked into corners or niches. Around the tables were mismatched sets of couches, cushioned stools, and frilly loveseats. Standing lamps with green tasseled shades stood scattered around the place.

"Welcome again," Tae's smooth voice came out of the shadows as the five of them headed for their usual table. She was carrying a tray as she headed towards them. "Here are some fresh cookies, still hot from the oven." Setting the cookies down, she went back to her place by the kitchen.

"Oh yeah!" Sano cheered in a rather loud voice. "Free cookies!" And old couple sitting by the door turned to glare at him. Megumi clapped her hand over her boyfriend's mouth and made a shushing noise. Misao laughed quietly as Sano shoved one of the cookies into his mouth. Flopping down on the couch beside Kaoru, she crossed her arms on the table and laid her head on them.

"Wake up, sleepyhead," Megumi poked the top of Misao's head. "You look like you need a coffee." At Misao's feeble nod, she continued, "It's on me today, hon. But promise me you'll get to sleep earlier, ok?" Misao gave her the promise wearily.

About half an hour later, five empty mugs sat on the table, accompanied by a plate of scattered crumbs. Sano and Megumi were pouring over his physics homework while Kenshin was just finishing up his own. Kaoru had her nose in a novel and Misao was putting her pencil away and snapping her math book shut.

"So, Misao," Kenshin said quietly as he put his own books away. "What's the matter? You've been crying all night. Do you want to share with us?" Sometimes, Kenshin knew even better than Kaoru did, and he wasn't even in her class.

"The redhead's right," Megumi chided," Share your worries, why don't you? Maybe you'll be able to sleep better tonight." Scribbling down one last thing for Sano's homework, she closed his books and shoved them onto his lap. "Time to listen, Rooster. I'll come over to your place later to help you finish up." Many other things would probably be happening at Sano's house, but of course the others just smiled and said nothing.

Grinning ruefully, Misao told her story once more. Her friends listened without a word. Kaoru squeezed her hand under the table. Misao finished in tears anyways, unable to hold it in any longer. Kaoru helped her up and escorted her to the washroom.

"Here Misao," she told her sobbing friend, "We're all alone now. I'm here; you can cry all you want." Kaoru put her arms around Misao, stroking the shorter girl's hair gently. "It's okay Misao, cry, cry." Misao's small frame shuddered with sobs; she whispered her grandfather's name over and over. Kaoru began to hum softly. She rocked Misao with her back and forth to the melody, and felt the wetness on her shirt grow with Misao's tears.

xxx

"Megumi," Kenshin said in the sudden silence after Misao and Kaoru's departure. "I don't mean to pry, but do you know why Misao doesn't live with her parents?"

"Yes," Megumi returned resignedly, "I do. She told me and Kaoru. I'm sure its not because she values you any less."

"Of course, I understand. Girl-talk right?" Kenshin winked, keeping the mood light.

"Nevertheless, perhaps you have the right to know. I'll tell you. Misao-chan will want you to know this now." Megumi had made her decision.

"Something warm, for your comfort." Tae had come with another round of hot drinks. Kenshin thanked his considerate cousin and she glided away to another table.

Megumi began her story---or rather, Misao's story

xxxXxxx

Responses

Sharpie-kun: yay my first reviewer! lol…I had to wait for you to finish gaming before you read my story too. Nerd.

TheUniverseBeyond: haha…I did realize like right after I finished this chapter that it wasn't going to turn out that short. But that's okay, it'll be a long fic! Bear with me, and thanks a lot. Criticism is good. If you don't mind, I would love to hear from you for my future chapters. )

Natarie: Thanks! ...haha yeah poor Jiya...

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	3. Hurting Child

Notes: This is all in the past. It's a shorter chapter, just to help you understand Misao a bit more. and a few other things too.

xxXxxCHAPTER 3xxXxx

"Aoshi-sama!" an eight year old Misao called. The tall thirteen year old came to her call; he always did. She had added on the honorific when they watched an old movie, where a man named Aoshi had been the leader of a ninja clan. "Aoshi-sama, I made Mommy a present! Look!" She held up a piece of paper with plastic sequins and butterfly cutouts glued on it messily.

"It's very pretty, Misao, I'm sure she will love it," Aoshi told her after gravely inspecting the little masterpiece. He smiled slightly at Misao's laugh of delight.

"I'm going to give it to her as soon as she gets home," Misao announced, running to lay it on the table by the front door. Then she skipped her way back to the living room to Aoshi. Her parents, along with her aunt and uncle, were out at a dinner party. Her cousins Omasu and Okon were staying with her and Aoshi until their parents returned.

"How's it going?" eleven year old Okon entered the room with a book under her arm. Flopping onto a couch, she began to read without waiting for any response to her question. Omasu followed her in, with her grade seven textbook and a pencil case. Lying on her stomach, she produced some lined paper and started writing.

Aoshi glanced at the clock. "Almost dinnertime," he commented nonchalantly, "Omasu, what did you bring?"

"Tempura and rice," The older girl replied. She had been put in charge of their evening meal, being the oldest and possibly the most mature. Of course, Aoshi's maturity could match hers but he refused to cook.

Resisting the urge to roll his eyes or remind her that she had promised Misao dessert as well, Aoshi lay down across the sofa and closed his eyes. It was not long before he felt a small something climb up and snuggle in beside him. Without opening his eyes, he put an arm around Misao, a soft smile tugging at his lips.

About half an hour later, smells of food filled the air. Omasu walked in holding two trays followed by Okon with another two. Aoshi rose from his place and gently shook Misao awake.

"We're going to eat in here tonight," Omasu announced. At Aoshi's raised eyebrow, she added, "None of our parents are here. I won't tell if you don't tell."

"I won't tell!" Misao sang happily, "I promise! I won't!" Dancing around the room excitedly, she almost knocked Okon's soup to the ground. "Aoshi-sama, you won't tell right?" He shook his head rather indifferently and grabbed the remote to turn on the TV. He flicked lazily through the channels and nodded at Omasu as she set his tray of food in front of him.

"Hey, look at that," Okon pointed at the TV with a grimace on her face. The news was on, showing the scene of a horrible car accident. A minivan had been thrown off the side of a highway, landing upside down on the ground below. There had been four passengers inside the car. The reporter said that the driver and two passengers had been killed on impact and the fourth passenger----a man----was alive but in critical condition.

Before any of the other children in front of the TV could react, Misao let out a piercing scream. She was staring wide-eyed at the screen where firefighters were lifting a bloody body out of the wreck. It was a woman, her silvery green kimono outfit stained in dark red.

"Mommy!" Misao's wail formed a single word. "Mommy! Mommy! That's Mommy!" She continued screaming and screaming. The others froze for a moment before Aoshi hurried to take her in his arms. She stopped screaming and then buried her face into his chest and cried. Omasu and Okon fumbled with the remote to turn the volume up. A second body had been extracted----a man in a suit----and Okon gasped.

"No way…." Omasu breathed, "That's Dad. Holy sh---" She glanced at Misao and cut off. Omasu started to cry, clinging to her older sister. The news channel had finished with the traffic accident and was moving on to the weather forecast.

"Aoshi-kun," Omasu whispered, "What's going to happen?" She turned the TV off.

He shook his head, "I…don't know."

The four of them sat in silence, save for the sounds of soft crying, for a long time. Misao had fallen asleep in Aoshi's protecting arms----she always slept after she cried. Omasu had her arm around a sobbing Okon. Aoshi and Omasu exchanged looked frequently, both trying to keep calm. Makimachi-san's clock ticked loudly on its shelf.

The door bell rang. Omasu and Okon both jumped and Aoshi unconsciously tightened his embrace around the still-sleeping Misao. The three older children looked out of the room in the direction of the front door. All of them were wondering _Who could it be?_

As if on cue, Misao woke up and rubbed her eyes. "Mommy's home. I had a bad dream. Mommy and Daddy are home now, and Uncle and Auntie too." Omasu buried her face into the nearest cushion as Omasu glanced at Aoshi. Misao looked around confusedly. "Why aren't we going to open the door? They must have forgotten their key. Daddy's going to get mad." She wriggled out of Aoshi's hold, but before she made it out of the room Aoshi came up behind her and scooped her into his arms again.

"Hush, Misao," Aoshi told her when she struggled and protested, "Something's happening. Something's wrong. It is not your parents coming home." The doorbell rang again, followed by a frantic pounding on the door. Misao's eyes widened in fright and she whimpered quietly, clutching at Aoshi.

"Are the Makimachi children in there?" There was a round of collective gasps from said children (plus Aoshi). "Open the door, please. This is the police." Omasu jumped up and ran to the door, followed by Okon. Aoshi put Misao down but took her hand before following the other two.

"It really is the police," Okon reported after peeking through the blinds on the window beside the door. Omasu took a deep breath and opened the door. Three uniform-clad policemen were standing outside, one with his hand raised to knock.

"Konbanwa," They chorused politely.

"They're good kids," a tall officer remarked to the mustached one beside him. The three policemen exchanged glances, making the four children feel extremely uncomfortable.

"You are the Makimachi children?" The officer who had been knocking asked, "Strange, nobody mentioned anything about a son." He stroked his goatee and peered at Aoshi standing behind the two older girls. Then he noticed Misao clutching Aoshi's hand and offered her a sad smile.

"No, my name is not Makimachi, it is Shinomori," Aoshi said in his usual expressionless voice, although his hand tightened around Misao's. "I have been living here with Makimachi-san since I was seven and my parents died." The officers nodded thoughtfully.

"You'll be coming with us," Mustache spoke for the first time. "Something has happened, but we were instructed to only be your escorts. I'm sorry, I cannot tell you anything."

"Get ready to leave," Goatee instructed briskly, "You have five minutes."

"Hai," they chorused with the exception of Misao who was hiding behind Aoshi. Omasu hurried to collect their unfinished dinner and brought the trays to the kitchen. Aoshi ran upstairs to his room and grabbed his wallet and MP3 player, stuffing them into the pocket of his sweatshirt. Omasu was helping Misao with her coat and called up to Aoshi to get her purse for her. Aoshi came down the stairs with the pink and white shoulder bag and handed it to the older girl.

"Thanks," she whispered, going to get her own coat. Okon was putting on her shoes already. Aoshi pulled his own coat on and jammed his feet into his sneakers before kneeling to tie Misao's shoelaces for her. The little girl had all but frozen in place where she stood, trembling as silent tears flowed down her delicate face.

"We're all ready, sire," Omasu said when they were all lined up by the door. The three policemen led them outside where two cruisers were waiting.

"Two of you will go with me, and the other two with them," the tall officer instructed. Obviously, he was a man used to being obeyed, especially by children. He was no prepared, however, for the reaction of one little child.

Misao screamed. She had her homemade artwork for her mother clutched in her small hand. She knew that it was her mother's body that had been on TV. If she got into this car, she would die too. No, no, no, no, no.

"Misao-chan!" Omasu hissed anxiously, "You'll make everybody think something bad has happened! The neighbors will all come running!" She realized what she had just said and cringed.

:Shush, Misao-chan," Okon tried to wipe the tears from the screaming girl's face but her hand was slapped away.

"No! No, no, no, no!" Misao wailed, "Don't you get it? Something bad DID happen! Mommy! Mommyyy!" She fell to the ground and pounded her fists against the paved driveway. The three police officers exchanged uneasy looks. This wasn't really part of their training.

"Misao, come on," Aoshi bent down and picked her up in his arms. "Why don't we go and see what it's really like? Maybe you can still give your mommy that present you were working on."

Watery blue eyes fixed him with an oddly mature look. "That vehicle will kill us all, just like Mommy." She told him sagely.

"No, don't worry," Aoshi whispered to her, "I'll protect you no matter what. I promise."

Misao sniffled. "What about Omasu and Okon? Who will protect them? I won't leave unless we all go together." She crossed her arms across her chest and stuck her chin up defiantly. In another situation, it would have been cute.

"Alright, you know what?" The tall policeman finally said, "The oldest one can sit in the front with me, and the other three will sit in the back." Ignoring the looks he got from the other officers, he opened the door of one of the cruisers and motioned for them to get in. Omasu sat in the front as instructed.

When they were all buckled in a ready to go, the officer put the key in and they drove off into the night.

xxxXxxx

Responses

TheUniverseBeyond: Hmm…yeah I guess her reaction is pretty weird. But um I haven't really said this anywhere but this is sort of based on when my grandfather died. I cried that night but I never cried at all after that until the funeral. I'll try to explain it in the next chapter, okay? Misao's not going to be all emotionless for long. T.T poor girl.

Wanderinglunatick: yes, about that. I was going to make it a very short and possibly very fluffy kinda thing that had a different idea. I changed my mind. P

Sharpie-kun: yes, nerd. You even follow instructions! O now, if only…nevermind ) thanks I hope this cleared up some more.

Natarie: Sorry! Aoshi's coming! I promise P I didn't want to rush it. it would be a bit ooc if he did anything like now.

Everybody else: thanks for reviewing ; )

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	4. Keep Holding On

Notes: Oooh this is sort of a filler chapter because it doesn't really further the plot that much but it just helps lead into the next part which does have some AxM! –celebrates- I'm sure you will appreciate it. Between this chapter and the next, Misao's emotions will be explained. Bear with me, please keep reading! Oh, and I think I will put up the next chapter very soon because this one might be kinda pointless otherwise O.o

xxXxxCHAPTER 4xxXxx

Megumi finished talking. Kenshin and Sano were sitting silently---if awkwardly----and staring into their mugs. The hot coffee had grown cold. Misao and Kaoru were still in the washroom.

"Wow," Sano finally breathed, "I never knew our sweet, genki Misao-chan had all this inside her." Megumi fixed him with a rather hard look.

"Well, I mean, I knew she didn't live with her parents and all. But that was a really weird subject and stuff, so I never really asked her about it." Sano rushed to assure his girlfriend that he wasn't actually as thick as she might think.

"It's true," Kenshin agreed quietly, "I knew something had happened to her in her past, but she tries so hard to hide it that I didn't have the heart to bring it up."

"I suppose we all understand her better after knowing these kinds of things," Megumi said with a sigh, almost to nobody in particular. The boys nodded.

"Here she comes," Sano muttered as he saw Kaoru and Misao emerging from the washroom. "I hope she's ok."

"Hey guys…" Kaoru helped Misao back to her seat. An awkward silence ensued.

"Um…Misao-chan," Megumi started uncertainly, "I sort of um…I told them about your parents. Exactly as you told me before. I'm sorry, I know I promised I wouldn't tell anybody, but I just thought…"

"She felt that we needed to understand your past before we could help you now," Kenshin finished smoothly. He was good at that. "Please Misao, we're your friends. Do you understand? We want to help you."

Misao nodded silently, not looking up from her hands clasped in her lap. The others exchanged looks. Misao's absolute silence was unusual, even for this situation.

The awkward silence settled over then again, only to be broken by the muffled sound of Beethoven's Ninth Symphony being played in a metallic tone----Misao's cell phone. Everybody sort of jumped and Misao reached into her bag to retrieve the silver and pink phone. The little bell on the butterfly ornament tinkled as Misao flipped her phone opened and looked at the display.

"Excuse me," she muttered politely, pushing back her chair and heading for the door.

"Hello," Misao said into the phone as cheerfully as she could. She grimaced when she realized how odd she sounded.

"Misao, are you at that café?" Aoshi's cold, expressionless voice came through the phone. At Misao's affirmative answer, he told her, "We need you to come to the funeral home. You do want to be part of the organizing, don't you?"

"Mmm, yeah of course," Misao responded accordingly, "But here's the thing: Kenshin has to go to his martial arts class afterwards and Sano's taking Megumi home, so----"

Aoshi cut her off briskly, "I will come and pick you up. I'll be there in fifteen minutes; wait for me outside."

"What about Kaoru?" Misao protested quickly before Aoshi hung up like he usually did after he had made his point. "I was supposed to walk home with her."

"She can come along too," Aoshi said resignedly, "Or I can drop her off at her house."

"Okay, thanks a lot," Misao said, forcing her voice to be bright.

"Outside, in fifteen minutes," Aoshi reminded her tersely before hanging up. Misao closed her phone and shoved it into her jeans pocket. Then she slumped against the wall and closed her eyes, tilting her head back. A chilly breeze blew across her face, lifting her bangs from her forehead. She felt cold, and detached---as if her soul was floating just out of reach of her body.

"Misao," Kenshin's gentle voice came from behind her. She had not heard the café's door open. "Was that Aoshi-san?" Misao nodded. Somehow, Kenshin always knew these kinds of things.

"Are you alright? No, no of course you're not. You've probably heard this before, but seriously, don't keep it inside, okay?"

"Yeah…" Misao responded quietly, "Thanks." Kenshin might be a bit of an old soul sometimes, with his fascination of the samurai ways, but he knew how to comfort her without making her pissed. Most people got too worried, which made Misao feel pissed on top of whatever else was going wrong. That was the reason why she tried not to show any trace of negative emotion around people.

"I'll be here whenever you need me." Kenshin took her hand and led her back inside.

"Who was that?' Megumi asked as Misao and Kenshin sat down again.

"Aoshi," Misao replied. "Kaoru, is it okay if you some with me when he comes to pick me up?"

"Sure. Are you going to drop me off, or what?"

"Um…did you want to come to the funeral home with me?" Misao ran a hand over her hair with a sigh. "We're making arrangements for um Jiya. I don't know why Omasu is so rushed about it, but she's always been and efficient one."

"Sure, Misao, but are you sure its okay if I come?" Kaoru was trying valiantly to keep the mood light even with the current topic of conversation. "I'm not really involved in it or anything."

"Yeah," Misao smiled tightly, "I'm sure. Actually I think I would really need you to be with me."

"Alright then, I'll come," Kaoru returned a genuine smile, seeing Misao relax a bit. "When is Aoshi-san coming?"

"He said he would be here in fifteen minutes," Misao informed her friend, "So um we better get ready to go. He wants us to be waiting outside." She and Kaoru packed their stuff back into their bags and each left some money on the table for their food and drinks, like they usually did.

"Okay, we might as well get going," Misao said, slinging her bag over one shoulder. "Bye guys."

"Bye," Kenshin and Megumi chorused. Sano waved and pulled a rather grotesque face just to piss Kaoru off.

"No, don't," Misao grabbed Kaoru's arm before she could attack Sano, forcing a grin. "Aoshi's going to be here soon, and I don't want a murder case on my hands." Laughing, Kaoru kicked Sano in the shin anyways and waved before following Misao to the front of the café and out the door.

The two girls stood outside with their backpacks, absently watching the road. They didn't wait long before Aoshi's car turned into the parking lot. Without delay, Misao opened the trunk and dumped her bag in, motioning for Kaoru to do the same. They both got into the backseat.

"Um, Aoshi do you want me to sit up front?" Misao asked before the car moved. She just realized that with his black attire, it seemed a bit like she and Kaoru were being chauffeured. Aoshi shook his head silently, and they turned out onto the road.

Misao sighed. Aoshi's emotions had all been shoved back behind his usual mask. Had the night before been just a dream?

As if sensing Misao's troubled thoughts, Kaoru reached over and squeezed her hand. Misao looked at her friend and offered her best possible smile at that moment. No words were exchanged but the two of them were close enough for at least some of the feelings to be shared.

"Here we are," Aoshi stopped the car in front of the funeral home. "You two go on in first. Omasu and Okon will be waiting in there." Kaoru and Misao opened their doors and got out. "Leave your bags here," Aoshi instructed.

"Can I just grab my cell phone?" Kaoru asked quickly. Aoshi waited for her to go in the trunk and get it before driving off to park the car. Misao and Kaoru hurried up the front steps into the funeral home.

Inside, the atmosphere seemed to press down on Misao, the dim lights making it even worse. The walls were an off-white marble streaked with gray and black, and the floor was plain black marble tiles. The place was elegant at first glance, but definitely a bit rough around the edges on further examination. There was a large skylight on the ceiling, letting in the afternoon sunlight.

A woman was huddled in the far corner of the foyer, alone and crying. Misao's heart clenched painfully and she could not help but stop walking. A few people in uniforms----probably employees here----came out and went over to the weeping woman. They were followed immediately by a woman dressed in black leading a crying child by the hand.

"Misao-chan, over here. What are you doing?" Misao looked up and found Kaoru standing halfway across the marble floor. Omasu and Okon were at a desk with an old woman sitting behind it. Quickly walking to catch up with Kaoru, Misao reached out for her friend's hand in a sudden rush of loneliness.

"Kaoru-chan!" Okon exclaimed, "Did you come with Misao?" She and Omasu were filling out papers.

"Yeah, I asked her to come," Misao explained quickly, "I was supposed to walk home with her today but she said she didn't mind coming with me."

"Oh I see," Okon said, "This is great, Kaoru. Actually, I'm glad you're here. We need all the support we can get."

Kaoru and Okon were chatting idly as Omasu finished up the papers and gave Kaoru her greetings. The old woman at the desk stood up and came around to their side of the table, holding a folder of papers and a binder.

"This way please," she indicated a door at the far end of the hall. The four girls followed her across the marble floor and out the door. There was a short walkway leading through a flower garden, and at the end of the walkway were several smaller buildings. There was a large window at the front of one, filled with multiple wreaths and bouquets. Some had slim banners covered in florid calligraphy draped over them.

Their guide showed them in the door beside the window, where another woman was waiting inside. Misao looked around and breathed in the sickly sweet scent of the flowers. There was too much of it, as basically the entire room was filled with different kinds of flowers.

"…for the funeral ceremony," the old woman was speaking again. Omasu motioned for Misao to come over from where she and Kaoru were standing.

"Look at these," Omasu pushed a binder towards them. "Which kinds of flowers will you choose? For Jiya?" Misao felt the desolation and tears well up inside her, but she quickly forced them down. She had already worried Kaoru enough today.

"Mmm…" She took the binder from her cousin and moved it so Kaoru could see. The laminated pages were filled with different kinds of flower arrangements. Misao and Kaoru flipped through the binder, stopping to examine some that caught their attention.

"Misao-chan, Kaoru-chan, have you two decided?" Okon came up behind them with a second binder. "Here are some more for you to look at."

"Oh, I get to choose one too?" Kaoru asked, taking the binder from the older girl. Okon nodded. "Thanks a lot."

"After all, we've known you for a long time. Jiya would love it if you gave your input." Okon smiled tiredly before turning away to look at a paper Omasu was waving around.

"Oh, look," Misao had found a simple arrangement of white and pale yellow lilies. "Jiya would love this, I think. He always liked lilies."

Kaoru looked over her shoulder. "Oh, that _is_ nice," she agreed. Then she opened up the first binder and riffled through. "I think this one is pretty too." She pointed out a wreath of light pink and purple flowers. "Do you think your grandfather would like it?"

"Yeah," Misao smiled at her friend. Then her face went serious again. "Kaoru, thanks a lot for coming with me."

"No problem!" You _are_ my best friend after all," Kaoru told her, grinning. Misao threw her arms around her friend, careful not to loosen her grip on her tears.

xxxx

The rest of the afternoon passed by quickly. Misao and Kaoru went through the rest of the organization with Omasu and Okon. Aoshi joined then a bit later; he had been making arrangements for the cremation.

"Ok, I think we're all done for today," Omasu announced at around 6:30 pm. "I'm glad we got this all finished early so we won't have to stress about it later." She looked around. "Everybody ok? I hope this hasn't been too hard on anybody"

"We're fine," Okon assured her sister, "It was a bit soon, perhaps, but its all good. I'm glad we're done." Misao nodded in agreement.

"Kaoru-chan, will you be joining us for dinner?" Omasu asked graciously, "I really appreciated your help today. What do you say?"

"Oh, um, I don't think I can stay," Kaoru told her apologetically. "My dad's on another business trip so I have to go and make dinner for Yahiko."

"We could stop at your place and pick your brother up, if that's the only issue," Okon offered.

"No, it's alright," Kaoru replied quickly, "Maybe another time. Thanks though "

"Don't worry about it," Misao said lightly, "Do you need a ride home?" At Kaoru's nod, she turned to Aoshi. He nodded twice before she could ask the question. "Thanks, Aoshi." She muttered.

"You three go on first," Omasu instructed, "We might go out for dinner tonight, but in any case we have to go grocery shopping before the store closes."

"We'll call if anything comes up," Okon said, "You both have your cell phones right?"

Misao nodded, "Yep. Okay then, um I guess I'll see you later." Aoshi turned and headed for the door without a word. Misao grabbed Kaoru's hand and bounded after Aoshi.

xxxx

Misao was sitting up front beside Aoshi in the car. They had dropped Kaoru off and were now, supposedly heading home. Aoshi cell phone rang and he picked it up off the dash and flipped it open. Misao half listened to the one-sided conversation as she stared blankly out the window.

"Yes-------Yes--------I don't think so------do you mind?--------No---------of course. You have my word.--------bye."

"Omasu?" Misao asked listlessly. Aoshi nodded. They sat in silence for a few minutes.

"Hey, where are we going?" Misao looked up in surprise. "Out for dinner? Aren't we meeting up with the other two first?"

"We are going out for dinner," Aoshi told her, "But not with the others."

"Eh?" Misao's ocean-blue eyes widened at the implications. Aoshi smirked but said nothing. Misao wanted to ask but she didn't know how to phrase it without making her sound stupid. So she remained silent, but her mind was working furiously over the possibilities.

_No way, what is he thinking about now?_

xxxXxxx

Responses:

EcstasyOfSesshoumaru: ehehe...thanks for the encouragement! ;) Yeah, like i mentioned at the top, the next chapter will come soon. And I'm just going to say that its just for you! haha...don't worry death threats are yummy.

sharpie-kun: hai hai...plot progression...Sorry guys, I'm actually terrible at writing, I'm just pretending to be good. and yeah you'll like the next one, my friend.

Natarie: Well um has anybody else noticed how alot of AxM fics have this protection kinda thing going for the plot? I thought I might as well...haha and they were kids so it's cute.

Everybody else: thanks for reviewing ; )

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	5. Silver and Cold

Notes: Mmm, I know you'll love this chapter! Lots of Aoshi-ness, compared to the other chapters anyway. I got all depressed writing it at the end too : P And about the next chapter, which I'm working on (!), please drop a review to let me know what you want to see next.I'm so worried that people don't like the way this is going, especially since I don't have much experience. i'm not updating again till i get at least ten more reviews O.O okay now read.

xxXxxCHAPTER 5xxXxx

"Ano….Aoshi?" Misao asked after swallowing the last of her pasta. "Why did you bring me here? You haven't said a word since ordering your food."

The two of them were sitting in an Italian restaurant. The sparsely spaced out tables were dimly lit by softly glowing lights on the ceiling and candles on the tables. To say that it was a rather romantic setting definitely was a valid argument.

"I thought I would let you have a bit of time away from the others," Aoshi told her quietly.

Misao frowned, "I could have just gone with Kaoru. It's not like I've never done that before." She studied Aoshi's stoic face as her mind ran back to the night before. She was certain that he had given her words and feelings from somewhere behind that mask. And just that morning he had--------

Misao blushed, trying to push the feeling of Aoshi's arms out of her head.

"I wanted…to talk to you." Aoshi muttered. Obviously, he knew she was having suspicions. He raised his cup of tea to his lips.

Misao's mind was thrown into disarray again. She failed miserably in her attempts to control her thoughts. Fighting many different battles inside her, Misao only won in terms of keeping her face carefully composed. She hoped that the dim lighting in the restaurant would hide her blush.

"Um…so, what did you want to talk about?" she asked hesitantly. Aoshi waved down the waitress and asked for the bill. He didn't reply to Misao's question. She waited. Over the years she had known Aoshi, she found that sometimes unusual silence from her would elicit a response.

"Let's go," Aoshi stood up and put his coat on. Misao pushed her chair back and followed suite.

"Wait!" Misao protested as they exited the restaurant. "I thought you wanted to talk about something." She quickened her footsteps to catch up with Aoshi's long strides.

"Yes," Aoshi replied, "But not in there." He gestured towards the passenger side of the car. Misao got into the car as Aoshi held the door open for her. When she was in, he went around and got into the driver's seat beside her.

"Where are we going now?" Misao couldn't help asking.

Jiya's death had already pulled her mind into confusion. She tried her best not to think about it, and determination had helped a little. But she needed time alone. Like _really_ alone. Something was being twisted and strangled inside of her; she wanted to cry and scream and hide in a little corner of the world forever.

Aoshi never responded to her question.

As Aoshi drove the car towards his destination, the sky darkened quickly. Gray clouds that had been loitering at the horizon all day now came rushing out to engulf the evening sky. Misao checked a sigh. It was going to rain. She hated rain. It made her feel down. Then again, it wasn't as if she could feel much more down than she already was.

The city's lights slid by in a blur of blinking neon. Outside the car, masses of people pulsed on the street. Happy faces. Laughing children. Excited lovers. Misao was trapped in a metal cage with plush seats, trapped with a man who's entire soul was made of ice. Oh joy.

She was so lost. Her mind was detached, and she seemed to have lost her soul somewhere. Every smile, every grin, every laugh she had expressed today was merely another decoration painted hastily over a cold shell. What was happening to her? Why didn't she feel anything?

The city slid away. Misao felt the thing inside her tie itself into knots. She was being gently kidnapped by a man who hadn't laughed for twenty years or so. She must be dead, or else why didn't she feel scared? She had been killed by Jiya's death. That must be it. Her body was just a little bit slow in accepting death. Her soul was already gone.

As Misao's tormented mind forced her to her twisted conclusions, she searched for a reason as to why she was doing this and why she wasn't letting herself cry. The only reason she allowed herself was that she was terrified of other people's sympathy. Her mask had kept her strong and grinning all day.

She knew Kaoru had tried to go along with it. When she told her story to her best friend in the change rooms, she had struggled to keep herself light and detached. Kaoru understood; she didn't show pity. In the café, Misao knew she had broken Kaoru's heart by making her watch her best friend cry like that.

Misao didn't want other people to be troubled by her actions. But she knew that she wouldn't be able to keep it to herself much longer. And now, there was this thing with Aoshi. What did he mean by doing all this? First he spilled out parts of his past while cleaning her room, then she woke up in his arms, and now he was treating her to dinner followed by a mysterious excursion to the middle of nowhere.

Misao had too much to think about.

"Are you alright?" Aoshi didn't take his eyes off the road. His hands were clenched tightly on the wheel, however; a fact which Misao took note of.

"I'm….fine,' Misao drew a breath and composed herself. "Where are we going?"

"You'll see," Aoshi replied tersely. Misao decided not to push it any further. If she was apparently dead anyways, she didn't need to know where she was going now. Yes, that was right. She was now….dead.

Misao convinced herself with these strange thoughts. Even in the void of her mind, she knew she was being silly, immature, and unreasonable. But what could she do about it?

"We're here," Aoshi stopped the car. "Let's go."

Misao obediently got out of the car and went to stand beside Aoshi. The night air smelled of coming rain. Misao looked around. She couldn't place their exact location, but there was definitely the tang of salt in the air. Aoshi had brought them to the ocean.

Misao was going to ask where they were, but Aoshi's hand suddenly enclosed her own.

"It's dark," he explained simply, "I know the way." Misao's mind reeled as he guided her through the darkness; there was not a light anywhere.

"Ano…where are we going?" Misao tried, but failed to stop her voice from quivering.

"Trust me," Aoshi squeezed her hand. Misao stumbled along behind him. This was odd. Aoshi asking her to trust him? Misao's numbed mind could not process it.

After an eternity or a few minutes, Aoshi reached his destination. Misao's eyes adjusted to the dark with a bit of help from the moon that was valiantly shining through a gap in the clouds. The storm had not yet gathered its full force here. She felt the softness of sand under her feet and the gentle lapping of waves somewhere close by.

"Would you like to sit or walk?" Aoshi was coolly polite, as always. Misao shrugged and chose the latter. Aoshi had released her hand, and was already strolling away. Misao's consciousness trembled and she felt a wave of nausea. Taking a deep breath to recover, she hurried after Aoshi.

When she caught up with him, Aoshi slowed his pace and shortened his stride. Misao clenched her fists at her side. She couldn't endure the silence anymore. She needed to scream and run around and jump on things. She needed to cry. Somehow, she couldn't let herself do it in front of Aoshi. Somehow, it mattered a lot what he thought of her.

Misao told herself she definitely wasn't developing a crush on him.

"Excuse me?" Aoshi sounded vaguely amused; Misao could see his smirk even in the dark. "I didn't catch that." Apparently, she had told herself out loud. She almost groaned but shook her head.

Another few minutes of silent walking and Misao had just about reached her limit. The moon had risen, creating a rippling silver reflection on the water. It seemed almost to keep the clouds at bay. Misao felt like a dam was about to burst inside her. NO. She had to be strong.

There was a picnic table sitting in the sand. One side had sunk about a foot, making the table slant. Misao gasped. A wave of nostalgia almost drove her to her knees as it combined with the flood of emotions inside her.

Strength. She looked out at the ocean. Why was everything swimming around so strangely? She realized she had tears in her eyes. Aoshi must not see them.

"Misao, do you know this place?" Aoshi was asking her. He didn't look at her, but stared out at the sea. Misao did not, could not, reply. Instead, she looked around her helplessly. In the hazy moonlit night, she thought she could see the shadows.

Shadows of her riding on Hannya's strong shoulders. Laughing. Shadows of her and Beshimi throwing sand and water at Shikijo. Laughing. Shadows of the massive Hyottoko jumping on one end of the table while Misao and Beshimi poured buckets of water into the sand underneath it. Laughing. Shadows of six children sitting on a slanted picnic table. The moon could have been the warm summer sun.

Misao found herself walking up to the worn wooden table. She ran her fingers along the familiar uneven surface. Aoshi was repeating his question. Misao turned to him, her hands behind her back still touching the table.

Surprisingly, her smile came easily, even with the tears threatening to flow. She pushed herself further so that her genki grin made her eyes almost close. That would keep the tears back.

"I do," she said in response to Aoshi's question. "Jiya used to bring us here with Hannya-kun and the others, right?" She didn't hear the tense undercurrent of her own laughter. "We never came here at night though. The moon is so pretty now!"

Aoshi was suddenly right in front of her. Misao's smile slipped in her surprise.

"Cry, Misao," Aoshi's voice was gentle." Cry as much as you need to. I'm right here." He reached out and pulled her toward him. One hand went behind her head, holding it against his chest. The other arm encircled her slender waist, bringing her into a protective embrace.

Misao could not respond. Her eyes had opened in the shock of Aoshi's unexpected actions, causing the tears to spill out. Aoshi's gentle voice came again, but Misao's mind could not process the words.

Finally, her world unraveled. She heard herself sobbing brokenly, but it might as well have been somebody else crying. Her hands fisted in the material of Aoshi's coat. He stroked her hair, not saying anything but just being there for her.

As she cried, the part of Misao that was floating detached realized something. All these years, Aoshi _had_ always been there for her. Why hadn't she seen this before? When her parents died, he had been the one holding her hand. When she and Soujiro broke up, he had helped her pack all the photos and other things reminiscent of her boyfriend into a box. He had even bought her a new keychain for her keys so she wouldn't have to use the one Soujiro had given her.

Since she was a little girl, he had been kind to her in his own subtle ways. Misao had always looked up to him, always seen him as a firm figure of strength. She had done everything she could to make him proud of her.

So did she love him? And what exactly did he think of her now?

Misao's tears fell without end. The moonlight turned them to falling diamonds before they splashed onto the sand below. A breeze had come, growing stronger. The clouds tore away, lacing the moonlight with shadows.

As Misao wept, she suddenly felt Aoshi's chest rising a falling irregularly. She risked a look up at his face.

Tears were streaking down his face, his azure eyes closed firmly as if ashamed. The ragged shadows of the clouds flew across his face, as if the demons of his own torment and grief were finally surfacing to ravage him. The mask had broken. He was beautiful even in this state.

Misao's heart broke. She reached her hands behind Aoshi to hug him back, trying to show her own affection as best as she could.

The two of them stood there for an eternity, sharing their loss. The clouds were gone and the moon hung high in the sky, illuminating their bodies----and their tears----with a soft silver glow. Even after the tears ceased to fall, they stood on the beach holding each other. Moon-tinged waves lapped softly at the sand as nature tried it's very hardest to wash away the bitterness and sorrow that stained its silver shores that night.

xxxXxxx

Responses:

TheUniverseBeyond: Thanks for the support:)

sharpie-kun: lol... eeeexcellent...--twiddles fingers--

EcstasyOfSesshoumaru: er...gomenasai for taking so long to update. I guess I got a little lazy. Things will pick up a bit now that I'm out of school for the summer.

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	6. Two Less Lonely People

Notes: fine…I updated…Thanks to all of you who DID review and this is for TheUniverseBeyond for all of your input/support, luv ya. Oh, and prepare for Aoshi being a bit OOC –sighs- I couldn't help it.

xxXxxCHAPTER 6xxXxx

"Where were you two?" Omasu gasped in anxiety and relief when Aoshi and Misao got home at around 10:30pm. The 18-year-old definitely looked like a mess, her eyes red and puffy from crying. Her cheeks were flushed and she was looking a little dazed. Okon hurried to lead Misao inside, taking her backpack from her and sitting her down at the kitchen table.

"I promised you I would keep her safe," Aoshi said to Omasu in a tight voice when she faced him with a stern expression, her arms folded on her chest. "And I did. I wouldn't let anything happen to her. Ever. You know that."

"But she's been crying!" Omasu protested, remembering to keep her voice low, "Tell me what happened. You're not the only one worried about Misao-chan. I'm her cousin; I have every right to know."

"What happened tonight stays between Misao and I. She can share with you if she wishes, but it is not my place." Aoshi's voice was cold. "She was crying because her grandfather died. I was only offering her comfort. Nothing for you to worry about."

Aoshi hung up his coat and headed up to his room without another word. Omasu stared after him confusedly before heading into the kitchen.

Misao was sipping a mug of warm milk that Okon had given her. Her eyes were closed and her face looked almost peaceful, but her hands trembled around the glass. Okon was heating water and Omasu automatically went to the cupboard to get out the tea leaves.

"Are you okay?" Omasu asked cautiously as she found some cups for the tea. Misao nodded and set down her half-empty glass. Omasu caught the ghost of Misao's grin before it vanished from her features.

"I'm going upstairs,' Misao announced after she had drained her glass. "I've got some physics homework due tomorrow and I've barely started." Getting her backpack, she headed for the stairs.

"Don't sleep too late," Okon called to her out of habit.

"Hai," Misao threw back over her shoulder.

Upstairs, she walked a short way down the hall to her bedroom. When she stepped into the darkened room, she took a deep breath. Her room always smelled familiar, something welcoming and comforting, but she couldn't name the scent. Reaching a hand out, she found the light switch easily and flicked it on.

As the light on the ceiling began to glow warmly, Misao closed the door behind her and dumped her bag on the floor. Then she crossed the room to close the flower-patterned curtains on her window, on the wall opposite the door. Her room was quite big----they had a big house----but the messy state made it appear more crowded. Despite Aoshi's small efforts the night before, clothing, stuffed animals, and books were still strewn all over the place.

Misao looked around and sighed. One of these days she would have to clean her room up. Yes, one of these days. She dragged her bag over to her desk. It was really a set of two desks pushed together, so it went along two walls. Her computer was positioned on the section that was against the same wall as the window, and a pile of papers and books sat where the desks met at the corner. Her jewelry, nail polish, make-up, and other accessories were in a mess on the remaining section of the desk, along with her pencil crayon set and other random stationery.

Using her toe, Misao pushed the power on for her computer and watched the monitor flicker to life on her desk. Sitting down in her chair, she unzipped her bag and took out her homework. Clearing some writing space on the desk beside her computer, she started her work.

xxxx

Numbers and symbols swam on the page before her eyes. Misao threw her pencil down and leaned back in her chair with a sigh. Her computer had been on for a long time. She let her mind drift off, watching the slideshow of photos that she had as her screensaver. Kaoru had put it together for her a few months ago aided by her brand new scanner, by 'borrowing' Misao's photo albums.

A picture of Misao and her friends laughing on the beach, taken last summer.

A picture of Misao eating ice cream while Sano held a bucket of water over her head, ready to dump.

Misao and Megumi splashing each other in matching light purple bikinis.

Several candid shots of Misao and her friends doing various school activities.

Then some with Misao and her cousins playing tennis, taken when Misao was in grade seven. A few others of them on various trips, accompanied by Jiya.

There was even a photo of a younger Aoshi holding an even younger Misao in his arms. This one, Kaoru had altered by typing "Awww…." In a pink, curly font across the bottom.

Misao watched the slideshow repeat itself twice before reaching out to move the mouse. The screensaver disappeared and her desktop materialized. Misao smiled----she always did----at the sleeping puppy on her desktop wallpaper, scattered with icons. She clicked a few things and put on soft music. That always made her work better.

Humming, Misao returned to her work. There. Much better. Half an hour later, she was finished. She put her stuff back into her bag and stood up. A wave of dizziness from her movement quickly pushed her back into the chair. Misao took a deep breath and tried again, rising slowly this time.

No dizziness.

Misao stepped away from her desk and flopped onto her bed, sinking gratefully into the softness. After closing her eyes for a few minutes, she turned her head to look at the alarm clock on the bedside table.

11:57pm

Misao sat up, suddenly realizing how tired she was. She hopped off her bed and went over to her computer. Resisting the urge to sit down and mindlessly stare at the screensaver, she turned the machine off. Then she hunted through her room until she found the pink nightgown she had been wearing the night before. Holding it up, she looked at it and then tossed it to the ground. She was feeling insecure, lost, and ultimately _cold_.

Misao found her fleecy blue pajamas in one of the neat piles Aoshi had put together the night before. She changed into the snug nightclothes gratefully. Yawning, she crossed the room to turn the lights off. She found her way back to her bed without crashing into or tripping over anything. Misao pulled the blanket over herself and fell asleep.

xxxx

Misao sat up with a gasp. Lightning flashed outside, flickering through her curtains. A crash of thunder made Misao jump. Kicking away her blankets, she got up and went to her window to watch the storm that had awakened her.

Rain fell heavily in a blurry curtain, blowing diagonally in the wind. Lightning flickered, flashing the world outside into an eerie white light. Misao clutched the curtains around herself, mesmerized by the storm. She felt an immense loneliness settle over her. Jiya was gone.

In a flicker of lightning, Misao recalled the feeling of security that she had found in Aoshi's embrace. It was akin to the warmth she could faintly recall from her childhood, when she and Aoshi had spent every possible minute together. Her earlier confusion returned to her. Why had he shown her such sudden and open kindness, when he hadn't had a decent conversation with her since she was twelve?

Misao had just made up her mind to go and ask him the next day, when her bedroom door opened slowly and quietly. She turned reluctantly from the window to see Aoshi's tall figure approaching.

"You should be asleep," he reprimanded quietly.

"So should you," Misao retorted rather childishly. "What are you doing here anyways?"

"I…" Aoshi faltered. Obviously, he had expected to find her sleeping, not awake and questioning.

Misao waited silently.

"I came to see you," he finally said, not quite meeting her gaze.

"That's all?" Misao demanded skeptically without really knowing why. What did she expect anyway?

Aoshi didn't reply but seated himself on Misao's bed. He patted the mattress beside him, so Misao sat down. She had left the curtains parted, and the next flash of lightning illuminated Aoshi's stern features in a cruel light. Misao flinched involuntarily.

Thunder rumbled, and Aoshi's straight posture drooped, his head bowing. Misao hesitantly reached out and touched his large hand. To her surprise, he was trembling.

"Misao…" his voice was but a hoarse whisper, "I'm sorry. I just wanted to…be with you." Her blue eyes widened. Then she recovered and shifted to lean against him. He shook her had off so he could put his arm around her shoulders.

"Now, why would you be sorry about something like that?" she asked gently, "Did you really think I would refuse?"

"You don't mind?"

"This?" Misao grinned, "Of course not. I was actually….feeling a bit lonely before you came in."

Aoshi didn't reply but sighed deeply.

"What's up?" Misao had to ask.

"Misao, what are you thinking right now?"

"Ehhh…" she was a bit confused at the topic. "Why?"

"Because I want to know," Aoshi told her matter-of-factly, "Because I can't tell."

"Maybe because we're sitting in a dark room and my face is down here," Misao returned sarcastically. Then she grew serious. "Anyways, isn't being mysterious and indecipherable your job?"

Aoshi chuckled, a pleasing sound to Misao's ears. When was the last time she had heard him laugh?

"You've changed," Aoshi said simply. "Since Okina's death, and it's only been a day or so. Are you feeling alright?"

It was Misao's turn to sigh. "Yeah, I suppose. It's just that----everything sort of happened all in a rush and I haven't really gotten a chance to be sad. I mean----well what you did----at the beach; that was really good of you. And----Um I think it really helped me and----oh I don't know what----? I'm just----ah…I'm just babbling again. Sorry."

Aoshi smiled, "That's more like you, now. Would you like me to…leave you? So you can be alone?" He dropped his arm from her shoulders. There was no reply from the girl, so he stood up. He was about to make an Aoshi-typical silent exit, when he was stopped by Misao. He turned.

The petite girl was holding onto his sleeve, her hand trembling. Her head was bowed and she tugged on the fabric in her fingers. As she raised her head to look at him, the tears streaking down her face were illuminated by a flash of lightning.

"Aoshi-sama…" the childhood nickname rose to her lips. When had she last used it? "Please stay with me. Please…I don't want to be alone."

Aoshi looked at her with a slightly worried frown. Shaking her hand away gently, he reseated himself on the bed beside her. Misao clasped both her hands tightly in her lap, her head bowed once more. Her small shoulders shook with sobs. She looked so fragile and helpless.

Aoshi felt his own memories rushing about in his head and threatening to overwhelm him.

xxxx

_.Aoshi's flashback._

_Eleven-year-old Aoshi was at a loss. He stood uncertainly against the wall and watched Misao crying in the middle of the room. The six-year-old girl could not find her usual playmates anywhere, and everybody else in the house was very busy. Aoshi felt like breaking down and crying right along with her, but his nature would not let him._

_What had happened the night before was entirely his fault. And he knew it all too well. Why? Why had he insisted on cutting through the park so late at night, instead of taking the longer way through the streets?_

_Noise. Gunshots. Screaming. Blood. Darkness._

_Aoshi squeezed his eyes shut, blocking off those fresh memories. _

_Misao was still crying._

"_Okina wants to see you," a gentle voice whispered. There was no mistaking that smell of lilacs, and sure enough, Misao's mother walked past him to comfort her daughter. The brief glance she gave him showed eyes shadowed by fatigue and red with crying._

"_Hai," Aoshi muttered, and left. He headed to the room that Okina had made his study. Knocking gently and announcing himself, he was invited in by the old man's voice._

"_Okina-san," Aoshi said with all due respect, making a small bow._

"_Aoshi," Misao's grandfather motioned to the chair on the other side of the desk he sat at. "Sit."_

_Aoshi obeyed_

"_Aoshi, my boy" The old man's voice was reedy, but it was a reed of iron. "I understand what you have had to go through. And I am proud of your strength."_

"_Thank you, Okina-san."_

"_I also am fully aware that I may be asking too much of you at this time, but I must have faith in you,' Okina sighed tiredly. "But there is something very important I must discuss with you, and I am afraid it cannot wait any longer."_

_Aoshi frowned slightly. "What is it?"_

"_I am an old man now, and I don't know how much longer I will be with you. There is something very precious to me that I wish to entrust to somebody, and you, Aoshi, are the best person I can think of." Okina smiled briefly at Aoshi. "Will you give your word to protect my treasure and care for it as I would, or better?"_

"_Yes sir." Aoshi replied seriously._

"_Good." Okina's face grew serious as well. "Then I am appointing you Misao's guardian."_

"_H-hai," Aoshi was actually quite shocked. Then again, it made sense for the old man's precious treasure to be his youngest granddaughter. _

"_Now that the others are no longer with us," Okina continued, "You are the only one who can watch over my Misao-chan."_

_Aoshi fought to keep his memories at bay. Beshimi screaming. Hannya's white mask falling cracked and stained dark crimson. No._

"_It was _my_ fault," Aoshi spat without thinking, his voice flat and cold. "I made this happen."_

"_You mustn't blame yourself----"_

"_How can I possibly watch over her?" He leaped to his feet, his chair toppling behind him. "How? I did this to her. I got them killed. _I'm the one who made her cry!_" _

_Rage blurred his senses and sharpened his memories. Shikijo bellowing as he leaped in front of Aoshi. No._

"_I'm useless! I cannot protect her, Okina-san, I have no right. I don't even think I can look at her face anymore."_

_Aoshi's anger at himself left as suddenly as it had come, because a little girl's tear-stained face came to his mind. Misao. Aoshi fell to his knees, dragging his hand across his eyes._

"_It's alright, boy," Okina was suddenly there, putting his arms around Aoshi. "Don't hold back. Cry all you want. It's the best I can do for you right now."_

_So Aoshi cried. After all, he _was_ still a boy. A boy who had been robbed of the ones he held dear, the people important to him. A boy lost and alone. _

xxxXxxx

Responses--

TheUniverseBeyond: Voila! I updated, just for you ;) hope it's still okay. Again, thanks for everything.

M.S Arashi Sumeragi: Oh, I'm so sorry –hugs- and yes, I agree with you! He's turning out to be a rather _human_ icicle, isn't he…thanks!

lil kagome 14: ahaha….thats actually pretty funny, but I'm going to have to say "…no thanks" lol but anyways maybe I'll take one of your suggestions for another story or something. It's too good to waste ;)

sharpie-kun: ……you seem excited…oh lol..about the full-chap flashback, it was only because I started writing it as a short flashback except…it got bigger. Many more flashbacks to come in the next chapter, which I have finished(!). and she _did_ finish the pasta! O.o….read back. "the last of her pasta" meaning she was done. Hmph.

Everybody else: thanks for reviewing ; ) and and and read/review my other stories if you haven't already! pweeease.

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	7. When We Were Young

Notes: ooh, I loved this chapter. Hopefully it's not too awkward, and yes, they might be more than a bit OOC but that can be blamed on the fact that lotsa stuff happened, they're tired and grieving, etc. do try to understand. And if not, I have devised a plan to explain things in the next few chapters. Bear with me!

Oh yeah and this was maybe very partially inspired by a scene from Gravtitation (by Maki Murakami) but no, there isn't any yaoi. O.o AxM, remember? ;) but I do like yaoi most of the time teehee. ANYWAYS onto the chapter.

xxXxxCHAPTER 7xxXxx

"Aoshi?" Misao shifted on the bed, trying to see Aoshi's face. He was sitting rigidly, his fists clenched in his knees and his head turned away from her. Misao took a shuddering breath and stilled her emotions. Aoshi had done so much for her, she realized, and it was the least she could do to be strong in front of him.

Firmly wiping her tears away, Misao slid off the bed to kneel on the floor in front of Aoshi. He didn't move a muscle. Misao put her hands over his clenched fists, feeling them tremble. Biting her lip, she realized she did not know what she could possibly do to help him.

Tears of frustration welled up in Misao's eyes, but she blinked them away hurriedly. Aoshi still had not moved, but his fists seemed to relax a tiny bit.

_Dammit, what am I supposed to do? _ Misao racked her brains for a way to comfort Aoshi without making either of them feel foolish. _He's a guy! A _man!_ Geez, boys aren't supposed to cry._

At that last thought, a faint memory same to Misao's frustrated mind. She didn't give it another thought before letting it put words into her mouth.

"Aoshi-sama, what are you doing? Are you angry with me? Please look at me," her voice was soft, and she could feel Aoshi loosening his hands. "Boys don't cry. Hannya-kun said that you'll always be _my_ hero right? You can't cry, because you're the strongest man in the world."

Aoshi's head jerked in her direction, his azure eyes widened in surprise. Perhaps he remembered as well.

"Boys don't cry. You're strong. Boys don't cry."

Misao almost smiled. It was working.

xxxx

_.Aoshi's flashback._

"_Boys don't cry, Aoshi-sama," a familiar little girl's voice came to Aoshi's ears. Hadn't he locked the door? He shuddered with the effort of suppressing his tears. Okina had entrusted him with Misao, and on his honor, Aoshi would protect her. He had to be strong._

"_Aoshi-sama, what are you doing?" Misao wore a worried frown as she sat down in front of Aoshi on his bed. The eleven-year-old boy didn't even look up. _

"_Are you----angry with me? Please look at me, Aoshi-sama."_

"_Misao…" Aoshi looked at her and met her worried, ocean-blue gaze. He had lost his brothers and his closest friends, but he still had this small, delicate piece of Heaven sitting here with him. Yes, he _would_ protect her. She was _his_ heaven._

"_Come here, Misao." He held out his arms and she moved to sit in his lap; it was a tradition of theirs. After sitting quietly for a moment and letting Aoshi wrap her up in his arms, Misao twisted around to look at his face._

"_Boys don't cry, Aoshi-sama," she gently brushed the tears from his cheek with her small hand. "Hannya-kun said you'll always be my hero right?" She settled herself back into his lap again, not noticing that he tightened his arms around her. _

"_You can't cry, because you're the strongest man in the world." Misao finished firmly. She almost sounded as if she were convincing herself._

"_Hannya…" Aoshi whispered hoarsely. His tears returned, sliding down his face and into Misao's hair. The girl made a quiet sound and wriggled out of his arms._

"_Mou…" The six-year-old sat back to study Aoshi briefly, and then crawled behind him. Putting her arms about his chest from behind and laying her cheek against his back, Misao closed her eyes._

"_Boys don't cry. You're strong. Boys don't cry. You _must_ be strong. Boys don't cry." _

_Misao's quiet murmurs calmed Aoshi's emotions. Even so, they remained like that long after his tears stopped and his breathing went back to normal. Somehow, Aoshi thought his bedroom didn't feel so empty anymore, even with the other two beds that would remain empty for a long time. _

"_How did you come in, Misao?" Aoshi asked, a bit later._

_Misao smiled at him sadly and reached into the pocket of her skirt. She dropped a keychain with two much-used keys into his lap. The keychain was a small, flat piece of silver engraved with the kanji for _Hannya.

"_Where did you get these from?" Aoshi was shocked. He had the exact same set of keys and the same keychain with his own name engraved onto it. There was one for his younger brother as well, but nine-year-old Beshimi never needed to use his keys. As far as Aoshi knew, they were still in Beshimi's desk drawer, shiny and unused. _

"_Mommy said that Hannya-kun and Beshimi-kun went on a long journey to somewhere far away. She said they might never come back here," Misao began in a wistful tone. "And she said that you stayed behind so you could play with me and take care of me while they're gone. Hyottoko-kun and Shikijo-kun went too, 'cause you know they're best friends."_

"_Yes," Aoshi whispered, "Yes they did."_

"_Hannya-kun must have known he won't be back," Misao reasoned thoughtfully. "He sent me a letter this morning and these came with it. I'll show you."_

_Aoshi didn't know what to say. _Impossible.

_Misao pulled a folded envelope out of her skirt pocket and handed it to Aoshi. There was no stamp and no postmark._

For Misao-chan.

These are my keys. The big one is for the front door and the small one is for my room. Take care of them for me while I'm gone, Misao. Beshimi's keys are in the third drawer of the desk. Please take care of those too. And tell Aoshi-sama not to worry about us. I'll miss you.

Love,

Hannya

_Aoshi smiled to himself. The slip of paper in the envelope was written not in his older brother's sharp, angular hand but in Okina's smooth and elegant script. The old man really did love his granddaughter. _

"_Well you'd better do as he tells you then," Aoshi smiled, putting the slip of paper back into the envelope and handing it to Misao. As she folded it and stuck it into her pocket again, Aoshi got off the bed and headed over to the wide desk he had shared with his brothers. Opening the third drawer, he found Beshimi's keys and tossed them onto the bed._

"_Beshimi," Misao read, picking up the keychain. "Ne, Aoshi-sama, do you think I need to keep all these keys?"_

"_You can if you want to."_

"_But I don't need two sets of them," Misao decided. "Beshimi-kun's are still new. You can keep them in the drawer in case you lose yours, okay?"_

"_Alright then," Aoshi smiled and took the keys from Misao. He carefully slid the keys off the ring and handed the engraved silver back to the girl. "You should take this."_

"_Hai," Misao put it into her pocket along with Hannya's keys. After a moment of silence, she said quietly, "They're gone forever aren't they? They're never going to come home." _

_Aoshi saw the faraway look in her eyes. She had known the truth all along._

xxxx

Finally, Aoshi made himself look down at Misao. She had his hands in hers and she was sitting quietly, patiently. Waiting for him, he realized. A relieved smile lit her face when their eyes met.

"Are you alright?" she asked him quietly. Her eyes looked tired, almost as if she were forcing herself to stay awake. She probably was.

"I'll be fine," Aoshi told her, "You shouldn't worry about me."

"Why shouldn't I?" Misao returned gently, "You're allowed to worry about me, so it ought to work vice-versa too."

Aoshi shook his head ruefully; he had grown up with Misao's stubbornness.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Misao peered up at him. She had grown up with a stubborn protector who hid behind his fool mask. Too bad it was transparent to her a lot of the time.

"Yes, thank you." Aoshi whispered.

Misao nodded, satisfied, and sighed deeply. Turning one of Aoshi's hands over, she hesitantly pressed her lips into his palm. Her kiss was so light that Aoshi thought he might have imagined it, had he not clearly seen her do it. Then she shifted closer and laid her head on his knee.

Aoshi smiled to himself and placed his hand on her head, his other hand grasping hers. Misao's eyes were closed peacefully, and she seemed to be falling asleep. Aoshi played with a strand of her hair between his fingers as he watched her breathing grow deep and even.

Outside, the thunder and lightning had passed, leaving only the sound of rain pattering in the night. Closing his own eyes, Aoshi allowed his mind to roam through some happy memories of the man he had called Okina.

He had been the grandfather Aoshi would never meet, and after Makimachi-san died, Aoshi saw the old man as a father-figure. Along the way, Okina had been a guide, a mentor, a companion, and more. And he had been Misao's dear grandfather, infamous lover of pink ribbons. Aoshi had been his family member too.

When Aoshi drew himself out of his own memories, he realized that it was the middle of the night and Misao should have been in bed. Guiltily, he actually considered leaving her as she was, just so he could watch her. Kicking himself mentally, he knew she would have sore muscles in the morning if he were selfish enough to let her be.

"Misao," he said softly, shaking the girl's shoulders gently. She moved and almost woke up but as soon as he released his hold on her, she crumpled and slept on. Sighing, Aoshi got up and went to kneel beside Misao's sleeping form. He picked her up like he had when they were younger and laid her on the bed. Carefully, he pulled the blankets up around her, watching her snuggle herself in, still sleeping.

Aoshi seriously considered standing there and watching her until morning, but he was sensible enough to know that he needed sleep. He was about to leave for his own room when Misao's voice rang through his head, choked with tears as it had been earlier.

_I don't want to be alone._

Aoshi felt a tug of familiar compulsion pulling at him, and he seated himself on Misao's bed, leaning against the headboard.

"Nnnn…" Misao squinted up at him with sleepy eyes. Aoshi looked down at her and shook his head with a smile.

"Sleep, Misao," he told her, closing his own eyes. He felt Misao shift beside him but ignored it. Then something soft plopped into his lap.

His eyes popped open to find a cushion on his legs. Looking at Misao, he found her eyes closed, her chest rising a falling evenly. Aoshi chuckled and shifted to put the cushion between him and the headboard.

"Thank you, Misao," he whispered. He could make out her grin even in the darkness. "Go to sleep."

The smile faded obediently and she reached out a hand. Aoshi caught it between his fingers and squeezed gently.

"Oyasumi," Misao murmured. Aoshi said nothing and closed his eyes once more.

_Oyasumi nasai, dear Misao._

xxxXxxx

Responses-

TheUniverseBeyond: haha…homework…oh that evil stuff. Tche I had to make her do something. Anyways I'm sure she didn't finish all the homework she had…ho ever heard of a grade twelve student with only one thing of homework in one night? Actually, I have no idea. But yes, her dedication is amazing. And wow, thanks, good thing that guy is still relatively in character. We'll see what you think by the end of the next chapter. X.x

lil kagome 14: O.O nightmares? That's not good –hugs- ooh. About Omasu and Okon….-ahem- (possible spoiler) Okon's going to get a little…PMS-y in the next chapter. Don't hold it against her though, she actually cares about Misao a lot.

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	8. Come What May

Notes: This chapter is another one that I thought would make a nice filler. –sighs- I dunno why I keep writing ones like these, but they're necessary! I mean, I tried to skip over it and write the next chapter but it didn't really work. I think I have writer's block….Too much music history does bad things to my mind. Anyways sorry sorry deal with it. I'll update next week to make up for the not-so-good chapter.

xxXxxCHAPTER 8xxXxx

The day of the funeral dawned with a clear sky and bright sun. Misao opened her eyes with a moan, still wanting to sleep more. She looked up at Aoshi sitting beside her on her bed. Since the night of the thunderstorm, he'd been there every morning. Sometimes, he knocked at her door before she was asleep, and other times he slipped in when she was already in bed.

It was still a surprise to her, each time he came, each little act of affection he showed her, each kind word he said to her. She always made up her mind to ask him what had changed and to clear everything up, but when he was there her mind never seemed to work properly. Misao resigned herself to waiting for events to spin themselves out. Besides, his now-constant presence in her life was definitely comforting.

"Ohayo," Misao whispered, not getting up.

She felt warm and safe, as she always did when Aoshi was with her. Every now and then, she found herself gingerly reaching to feel the dark void that Jiya's death had rent in her soul. It was still fresh and bitterly painful, but when Aoshi's voice brought her back into the world she could feel the pain numbing in inexplicable warmth. In fact, many nights since then, she had woken up sobbing. And Aoshi had been there every time, comforting her.

"Ohayo," Aoshi returned quietly. "Don't take too long getting ready. We need to be at the funeral home on time, and breakfast is waiting."

"Hai," Misao rubbed her eyes and sat up. Hopping off the bed, she opened her closet and got out her outfit for the funeral. Omasu had insisted that they all wear plain black to keep things simple. Aoshi stood and went to the door.

"I'm going to return to my room," He told Misao from the doorway, "I have to change too."

"It's about time," Misao laughed teasingly. "I was getting tired of changing in the bathroom." Aoshi gave the slightest of smiles and closed the door behind him.

Misao poked the power button on her computer and turned the monitor on. She stood watching the monitor flicker to life, and then headed for the door to the bathroom. It opened into a short, narrow corridor with a door at the other end and the door to the bathroom on one side. The door opposite led to the room that Omasu and Okon shared.

After Misao finished washing up, she studied herself in the mirror before heading back to her room. She bumped into Okon in the corridor, and the older girl looked as if she'd been crying.

"Okon!" Misao put her hands on her cousin's shoulders, "Were you crying?"

"Yeah…" Okon sniffed, looking down. Her breathing was still slightly shaky. "Don't worry about me though, go get dressed and come downstairs."

"If you say so," Misao replied reluctantly. She looked at her cousin's black skirt and lace-trimmed black blouse. "You look nice."

"Thanks," Okon gave a tentative smile before pushing Misao lightly in the direction of her room. Misao left the door open and watched Okon disappear into their shared bathroom.

Sighing, she thought of the times she had cried in the night and found Aoshi by her side. She thought of the times she had been down at school and Kaoru and the others had helped her smile. It had been hard on everybody. She was grateful that she had people close to her helping her, but she did not have the strength yet to be helping Okon.

Misao took her pajamas off and dressed in the black outfit. Omasu had even gotten her a black bra to go with everything. Misao studied herself in the mirror on the door of her closet. Usually, she avoided wearing black clothes as much as possible because it made her feel…sad. That was the only word. Kaoru had once joked that black would absorb all of Misao's genkiness. Perhaps she was right.

A little self-consciously, Misao tugged the embroidered black tank top higher. Did other girls really like wearing these clothes? Kaoru and Megumi certainly didn't. At least she was able to appreciate the black bra. Misao made a mental note to thank Omasu for it later.

Taking a closer look, Misao fingered the small white and silver lilies embroidered onto the black fabric. _Jiya would like this_, she thought with a wistful smile. Her pants were black and plain, which she was grateful for. Omasu hadn't forced her to wear a skirt. Finally, Misao pulled a thin, short-sleeved black blouse over the tank top and left the buttons all undone.

Going over to her desk, Misao found her hairbrush and set to work with her hair. She plaited it back into its usual braid, but used a black clasp to tie it off. She opened a drawer and found a folded pink sash. Wrapped in it was a necklace Jiya had given her. A clear heart-shaped stone with peculiar streaks of color running through it hung on a simple black string. Misao dropped it over her head and tied the pink sash to the beginning of her braid.

Standing up, Misao put her watch on a grabbed her wallet. After a few seconds of considering, she just took out a couple of bills to put in her pocket, dropping the wallet back on the table. She wouldn't need a purse.

Taking one last look around her room, Misao left to go downstairs.

"Ohayo, Misao-chan," Omasu chirped when she entered the kitchen. "Aoshi came down and made breakfast today. We've been waiting or you."

"Oh, sorry," Misao said sheepishly, glancing at her watch.

"You haven't worn that in your hair since…forever!" Okon remarked, stepping behind Misao to look at the pink sash in her hair.

"Since I was 12 actually," Misao smiled at her cousin. "Jiya always liked it. I thought I'd just do it today."

Omasu smiled. "That's great. Lets eat breakfast, or we'll be late." They all sat down at the kitchen table. Aoshi had cut slices of various fruits and arranged them neatly on a plate. Aoshi himself was not present.

"Where's Aoshi?" Misao asked around a mouthful of apple. "Has he eaten any?"

"He's been in his room since he finished this," Okon replied. "I saw him coming upstairs when I left my room."

"Is he okay?" Misao put her fork down to sip her orange juice.

"I don't know," Okon said exasperatedly, "Since when does he show emotions on his face for everybody to see?""

"True," Omasu mused, "Oh Misao-chan."

"Hm?"

"I saw Aoshi going into your room the other night. Is everything okay?"

Misao chewed on her chunk of watermelon slowly, thinking for an explanation that wouldn't sound ridiculous. _They just wouldn't believe me if I told them what he's been doing for me. Either that, or they'll jump to conclusions, and I don't want anything to happen between us. _

"No, everything's fine," she said slowly. "He was just…trying to help me."

"With what? Your homework?" Okon frowned disbelievingly, "At eleven o'clock at night?"

"Not my homework," Misao returned in a tight voice as she speared another piece of watermelon with unnecessary force. _Why can't they just understand? Why do they need to ask anyways? _It made her uncomfortable talking about Aoshi, not to mention the things he'd done for her.

"Then what?" Okon demanded impatiently. "Spit it out. What the hell are you doing that you can't tell us about?"

"We aren't doing anything wrong!" Misao snapped, throwing down her fork. "He's been helping me---" her breath caught "Cry."

"Oh, so that's it," Okon said acidly, "You two have been _weeping_ in each other _arms_ night after night. Don't think I can't hear you from my room. You're _laughing_ all the time."

"Okon---" Omasu began.

"Don't you dare protect her now," Okon hissed at her sister, "Jiya's gone, can't you see that? Don't you even _care_ how serious this is? This is no time for---for---_romancing_."

"What the hell!" Misao cried, "I just needed---" she faltered. How was she supposed to explain the strange security that Aoshi brought her? Ho could she put into words that feeling of nostalgia that Aoshi gave her when he spoke of the parts of his past he'd shared with her? How did one express a love that had sprouted in childhood innocence and changed over the years, only coming to full bloom now?

"You needed what?" Okon spat, "_Sex?"_

"Calm down," Omasu grabbed her sister's arm, only to be shaken off roughly.

"No! Stop it!" Misao howled "You don't understand! You never will!"

She jumped up and ran out of the kitchen, leaving her two cousins behind. Her frustrated tears blinded her as she stormed up the stairs. She tripped in her haste and fell, colliding with something that wasn't the stairs.

"Misao…" the girl looked up, finding herself in Aoshi's arms. "Don't let them anger you. They may not understand now, so try to forgive them. They only mean you well and you have all been through a terrible ordeal."

Misao took a deep breath and calmed herself. Somehow, Aoshi's voice could make her do anything. While she considered whether it was good or bad that he had so much influence over her, Aoshi seated himself on the step. He took Misao's hand and she let herself be pulled down to sit beside him.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Aoshi asked in his quiet voice. Misao's couldn't help giving him a surprised look. She knew she was being silly, but even after what had happened in the time since Jiya's passing she was still not used to Aoshi speaking first.

"I dunno what I'd say," Misao confessed. She fidgeted with the end of her braid; a childhood habit.

"Well you can begin with stating the problem," Aoshi told her. When she gave him a sideways glance, she noticed the smile playing on his lips. Was he _teasing_ her?

"You," Misao said with a scowl.

"I'm hurt."

"Not helping!" Misao exclaimed, but the scowl left her. "It's Okon. She's making a big deal about you coming to see me all the time."

"I heard."

"…"

"Continue."

"Honestly…Well, I mean, um, it's not like we're _doing_ anything," Misao finished in a rather lame manner. Aoshi didn't seem to notice.

"Everybody's nerves are a little tight right about now," he sighed. "Myself included. Perhaps that is why I've chosen to spend time with you."

"Huh?"

Aoshi shook his head. "Never mind."

"No, tell me," Misao demanded, stubborn as always. "Why do you say that?"

"Being with you…comforts me,' Aoshi muttered grudgingly. Misao was shocked, once again.

"Well, um, I could say the same about you," she said with a nervous laugh. "But still, I don't want Okon getting on my back about spending time with you."

"Do you find it a problem, then? For me to be with you?"

"No, of course not!" Misao replied, a bit too quickly, she thought. Aoshi didn't seem to notice that either.

"Explain."

"Ummm," Misao fumbled for words. "I was thinking about it just now, when Okon was ragging on me. And um---well it's a bit hard to explain."

"Try."

Misao checked a sigh. So it was back to one-word sentences.

"When I'm with you---I feel---"

"Go on," Aoshi prompted when she did not continue.

_Two words, _she thought wryly, _what an improvement._

"Safe." She finally said. Aoshi raised his eyebrows. Misao continued quickly, suddenly uncomfortable. "I mean, I don't know. I don't feel sad so much about Jiya when you're around. It's like---I know you'll be there for me and that somehow you know exactly what I'm feeling. And even if I cry---well that's something else, I guess."

"Are you afraid to cry in front of me?"

"No, I'm not," Misao replied firmly. "Besides, it's not as though I haven't done it enough already."

"I see," Aoshi laced his fingers together. "Anything else?"

"Um yeah, tons of things," Misao said; this time her laughter was lighter. Then she glanced at her watch. "But we should be leaving soon and I don't have time to tell you everything."

"Fair enough," Aoshi got to his feet and held a hand out to Misao. "But you will tell me later."

It was a statement of fact, not a request.

"Hai."

xxxXxxx

Responses—(ahaha I totally forgot to write these so I had to redo it AFTER somebody reviewed it. teehee my bad)

TheUniverseBeyond: ROFL I like that "I'm in love with tea and meditation" line. XD thank you thank you I feel much better

lil kagome 14: whoooo 10 points for you! –huggles- you're awesome

alexnyukiluvr: Um….20? I don't really think so. I might hit 15 though. I'm not sure yet, but hopefully it won't be too long. Thanks

sharpie-kun: …sorry! Kekeke is it really that father-daughter? Doh…lol ya okay that's going to change soon anyways

Everybody else: thanks for reviewing ; ) and and and read/review my other stories if you haven't already! pweeease.

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	9. Last Little Detail

Notes: Wowww….this was so hard to write! I had to fix up the situation with Okon (ahaha….) and then the funeral part. I wanted to put in as many details and small things as possible, because I sort of felt like it had to be at least a little closer to the heart. Hopefully I did okay, although I don't have much confidence. It took me a while to find the balance between 'detail' and 'tedious' so…yeah. Do drop a review to lemme know how it was.

xxXxxCHAPTER 9xxXxx

"Misao-chan?" There was a tapping at her door. "Misao-chan, it's me, Okon. Can I come in please?"

"Yeah, it's open," Misao called back, not moving from her computer. She heard her bedroom door open and caught a glimpse of her black-clad cousin in her peripheral vision.

"Hey, uh Misao," Okon stood behind her and Misao turned in her chair to look up into her cousin's face. "Sorry about before."

"It's okay, I'm not mad at you," Misao assured her quickly when Okon didn't meet her gaze.

"Listen, Misao-chan," Okon finally said in a low voice, "I don't even know why I said all those things. It's just that even in these times you still find a reason to be happy."

"But I---"

"No, I mean, it's a good thing that you have it in you," Okon cut her off quickly. "I guess I'm just jealous." She gave a rueful laugh that sounded to Misao rather forced.

"Oh, Okon," Misao stood and put her arms around the older girl. "Don't say that, silly. I cry too. Sometimes it's so hard for me just to get up, go to school, and keep myself moving."

"But Misao, you've got Aoshi," Okon pulled away with a small smile, gripping Misao's shoulders gently. "You should feel lucky he's taken a liking to you. When you cry, isn't he the one who's there for you?"

"Uh…well yes, but still---"

"That's it," Okon's smile grew. "That's why you can be happy because Aoshi-kun can help you cry. I'm so sorry. I understand now."

"Okon…" Misao looked into her cousin's tired eyes. "I want to help you, and Omasu too. But I can't. I can barely take care of myself as it is."

"That's fine, Misao-chan," Okon grinned. "I'll be okay. Today's a pretty big day and Jiya wouldn't want to see us crying, right?"

"Right." The girls embraced again.

"We're leaving in five minutes," Okon told Misao after glancing at the clock.

"Okay," Misao sat down to turn her computer off as her cousin left the room.

Three minutes later, Misao was ready to go. She had her shoes on and was standing beside Omasu and Aoshi by the front door.

"You're driving," Okon came out of the kitchen and tossed the keys to Omasu.

"Ow, geez," Omasu muttered as she grabbed for the flying keys, then inspected her hand. "You could've just handed them to me instead of throwing them across the house."

"Yep, probably," Okon agreed cheerfully, "Let's go. I'm sitting in the front."

"I don't think anybody else wants to," Misao assured her dryly, heading out the door. They all piled into Omasu's old Corolla and Okon got her seat at the front.

The drive to the funeral home was mostly silent, save for the radio. Okon dozed off and Aoshi stared out his window. Misao took the chance to…well, stare at him. Hw was dressed in black, like the rest of them, and it wasn't fancy. A plain black shirt with no tie outlined his chest and shoulders. His pants were black as well, with matching belt and shoes.

Misao's eyes traced up his chest and neck to study his profile/ His face was emotionless and the lines of his features were stern and unyielding. That was the face she'd known for what seemed like a very long time---until recently. Something in the back of her mind shifted, and an image of Aoshi's lips curved up in a smile flashed before disappearing. Misao shook her head slightly. It seemed to her that everything she could remember about being close to Aoshi had been taken from random photographs and Jiya's rants. None of the memories were really _hers_.

Not for the first time, Misao pondered Aoshi's new behavior towards her, and what might have caused the change. Surely it couldn't have been entirely the effect of Jiya's death? Misao couldn't recall any signs of Aoshi being close to the old man at all.

"Is there something terribly intriguing about my face?"

Misao gasped. While she'd been rooting through her more shaky memories, the twenty-three year old had turned his head to look at her amusedly.

"Er…" she hastily looked away, feeling a blush creeping across her cheeks.

"What's going on?" Okon woke from her light slumber.

"Nothing," Misao replied tightly. Her cousin gave her a skeptical look but said nothing. Misao bit her lip. Suddenly, warmth washed over her entire being as Aoshi reached over to cover her hand with his briefly. When she looked up at him, his hand was already resting on his knee once more.

"Okay, we're here," Omasu parked the car. She tapped the clock on the dash, "Just in time."

"Look, there's Kaoru-chan!" Misao spotted her best friend standing alone at the side door of the funeral home where they would enter from. She hopped out of the car and ran to her friend.

"Misao-chan!" Kaoru greeted her, coming over to give her a quick hug. "How are you feeling?"

"I'm fine," Misao replied firmly, holding back a sigh. "Here they come; let's go." She led the way into the building as the other three caught up.

The door led to a short corridor that ended a long narrow room. The five of them were greeted by two members of the staff. An open doorway at one end of the room showed a staircase and on the long wall opposite where they'd entered was another door. It looked a bit like a store room; there were two stacks of chairs here, and three cardboard boxes there, along with two huge jars filled with small white packets.

"This way please," the man with the funeral house's uniform ushered them through the door. He'd introduced himself as Ryoichi and the woman with him was Miyo.

Misao felt Kaoru come up beside her and the girls joined hands. Kaoru's blue eyes were wide and her lip was trembling. Noticing, Misao tightened her grip slightly on her friend's hand and followed the others into the main hall.

It was a large hall with a ceiling that swooped upwards in arches as high as the building was. They'd booked in one of the largest halls available. The floor was tiled with marble a shade redder than chocolate, with black flecks. The walls were a rich creamy color, perhaps a shade darker than soy milk, with darker wisps in the marble.

Still holding Kaoru's hand, Misao followed the others into the middle of the hall. She turned to look back in the direction they'd come, and hissed through her teeth as her stomach clenched painfully. Squeezing her eyes shut, she rested her forehead against Kaoru's shoulder.

"What happened? You okay?" Kaoru whispered into her ear.

"I just…Jiya…" Misao took a deep breath and raised her head to face the back wall. A large photo of Jiya hung on the wall, framed by white gauzy sashes. Misao heard her friend murmur something sympathetic but the words didn't register. She let go of Kaoru's hand, allowing her feet to carry her toward the photo. She saw her own choice of white and yellow lilies beside Kaoru's pink and purple selection among the forest of flower arrangements. The ones that weren't theirs would be from family friends, Jiya's former colleagues and university buddies, and others from distant relatives only Omasu could remember.

"Misao, wait up," Kaoru came up behind her. "Don't push me away. I'm here for you, remember? I…I miss Okina-san too."

"I'm sorry, Kaoru-chan," Misao whispered, looking at her friend guiltily.

"Don't worry about it," Kaoru smiled wearily. "Come on, you were going to look around weren't you?"

"Uh, yeah," Misao mumbled. The two of them made their way through the flowers. Two marble pillars framed a casket shape that rose out of the floor. The pillars were the same color as the wall, fluted marble rising all the way to the ceiling. Two long white cloth banners with calligraphy written down them hung from the columns.

"Hey who did these?" Kaoru indicated the banners. Misao shrugged, walking over and bending down to look at the name signed at the bottom corner of the cloth.

"Er…"

"Wow, did you know he could do that?" Kaoru came up behind her to look over her shoulder.

"No," Misao muttered, glancing back to where the others were standing. She could've sworn the subject of their conversation had just turned away when she looked. "Keep your voice down," she hissed at Kaoru."

"Hai, hai," the other girl whispered back, following her gaze.

Misao walked over to stand under her grandfather's photo, looking at the marble casket. Shiny white marble with black streaks made the sides of the rectangle and glass curved over the top. Carefully avoiding the pots of tiny white flowers lined up along the sides, Misao leaned to peer down through the glass.

There was a rather long drop down to something like a basement. Misao could see people walking around, most dressed in the white and grey uniforms of the funeral home staff. With a slight shock, Misao picked out a black-clad figure with familiar broad shoulders. He was directing a few people to work on something that was just out of Misao's range of vision.

"Whoa…where'd Aoshi-san go?" Kaoru suddenly asked. "He was right there, and he just disappeared."

"Down there," Misao supplied, stepping away so Kaoru could take her place.

"What the..?" Kaoru peered down through the glass.

"You two, come back over here," Omasu called.

"Eh? Okay," Misao called back. "Ah! Watch the flowers!" Kaoru pulled the hem of her black skirt away quickly.

"Oops…" she bent to fix up the flowers she'd disturbed before joining Misao and the others. Aoshi was just coming back into the hall with a quick stride through a side door Misao hadn't noticed before.

"We go back into that room now," Omasu indicated the door at the back where they'd entered. "The guests should be arriving shortly. They'll be lined up in order of um, importance: family first, then others. Then we come out to bow and stand at the front, and the ceremony begins."

"Doesn't sound very traditional," Misao commented.

Omasu shrugged. "We all know how eccentric Jiya is—was." Omasu turned her attention to Kaoru, making Misao feel as if she'd missed something. "You'll have to stay outside, I'm afraid. I'll tell them you get to stand with the relatives."

"Oh thanks," Kaoru gave a small bow before hugging Misao and stepping away. Omasu nodded to her and the rest of them headed to the back room.

Misao followed Omasu and Okon through the doorway, feeling suddenly lonely with Kaoru's absence. Something brushed her shoulder and she turned her head to glance back at its cause. Aoshi met her startled gaze with his softened azure one. She tore her gaze away quickly, suddenly embarrassed. The door closed behind them and the four of them stood in silence in the dimly lit room.

"How many people are coming?" Misao inquired quietly as the buzz of conversation filtered through the door.

"Um…I'm guessing maybe a hundred?" Omasu replied after a moment's thought.

"No, more than that," Okon disagreed with a frown, "I'd say maybe 150."

"I thought you guys had prepared for more than that," Misao said absently.

"Yes, but you can hardly expect everybody invited to come, right?" Omasu explained. She turned to her sister, "And you shouldn't pin your hopes up so high."

Okon muttered something unintelligible and walked over to one of the stacks of chairs by the wall. She took two down and sat on one. Misao went to sit in the other one, and to her surprise Aoshi followed right behind her. He took down a chair for himself and another which he offered to Omasu.

"What's in those jars, by the way?" Misao gestured at them.

"It's candy,' Okon replied, "Jiya said----he said that he wanted those who carry pain and bitterness inside them to um…" she trailed off.

"Sweets to ease the heart," Aoshi stated quietly. "That is what he said."

"My teeth will all have fallen out and rotted by the time my heart…never mind,' Misao muttered. In a slightly louder voice, she asked, "How come I never knew about any of this? I asked but it was always 'we've got it all planned out' or something."

"Jiya made us swear not to tell you," Omasu told her gently, "He knew you'd be upset."

Misao was about to give a scathing reply but thought it through and decided better of it. She knew Jiya had been right.

"I suppose we can tell you now," Okon said with a sigh. "Jiya started to plan this funeral while he was in the hospital."

"What?"

"Have you ever wondered why the arrangements were finished so smoothly?" Okon continued, ignoring the interruption. "Half of them had already been done. He left us three notebooks full of plans, diagrams and all."

"He told me it was something to do," Omasu put in, "He knew he would leave us soon; we all have to die someday. But instead of fearing death, he made it exciting for himself, assuring that every detail would be to his taste, all the way to the end."

Misao closed her eyes against the rush of tears she knew would come. She felt someone pat her shoulder, probably Okon she thought, and opened her eyes again. Okon was five feet away, kneeling to look at the candy jars. Omasu was already out of her chair, heading for a beckoning staff member whose silhouette in the light of the doorway looked like Ryoichi. Misao cast a confused look around before realizing that Aoshi was still sitting, his chair behind and to the right of her.

Something passed between them when Misao's ocean-blue met Aoshi's blue-green gaze. The girl pulled her eyes away---with some effort---and closed them, slumping back in the chair and tipping her head back. The tears were gone.

Misao imagined the sadness and grief inside her gathered into an icy black pool, and a strong wall around it, keeping her soul safe from harm. The picture melted into Aoshi's face, streaked with tears and tinged with moonlight. She could almost feel his arms around her again, along with that safety and reassurance.

"Is everything okay?" Omasu's voice brought Misao back to reality. The older girl was standing in front of her with a worried frown.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Misao replied with a tight smile. "What's up?"

"Miyo-san just came to tell me that there are far more people than we expected," Omasu told her, sounding as if she didn't believe it herself. "And apparently there are still more coming. We might be a bit delayed and there's no way we'll be able to seat everybody."

"I guess they'll just have to stand then, right?" Okon joined her sister, dusting the front of her skirt. Omasu nodded, taking her seat again.

"Do we have enough candy for all those people?"  
Misao thought to ask, not even out of interest.

"Ummm….if they see us running out I'm sure we'll be able to ask for more," Omasu reasoned. "They're all provided by the funeral home anyways." Misao nodded. All the feelings inside her seemed to be twisted up into a tight little ball and tucked away behind a flaring shield of warmth. She clung to the one exhilarating feeling of Aoshi's arms around her, and the gentleness she'd found in his eyes. It kept the tears at bay.

"We're ready to begin," the grey-and-white uniformed Miyo slipped in through the door. Omasu rose and headed for the door; the rest of them followed suite.

xxxXxxx

Responses—

TheUniverseBeyond: oooh laziness. That's the best part about life yupyup. Thank you thank you!

lil kagome 14: heh gomen gomen. I know I took a while before updating, but at least I did! Bwaha….hope you liked this chapter too. I'll post up the next one soon too, just for you, my dear. Thanks for the support.

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	10. Be My Escape

Notes: yay, I got to have a little fun with this, especially near to the end. Hope it was okay (not too tedious) and I'll have to remember to set some time aside to finish typing up the rest of the story. Sorry again, i took SO long to update : (

xxXxxCHAPTER 10xxXxx

Misao's feet dragged as she followed behind Okon. She didn't feel like standing before so many people---even a hundred were a lot, never mind 'far more than expected'---especially not when she was dancing on a knife edge between exterior calm and the insanity of grief. Something warm rested against the small of her back. Turning, she found Aoshi, who'd apparently been slightly behind her there all along. She let him keep her moving towards the door but his hand fell away as soon as they were out.

Misao reluctantly fell into step behind Okon, searching the faces for Kaoru. The hall was packed with people, all the way up to the dream marble walls. Misao couldn't even see all the way to the doors anymore. There was Kaoru, in the front row standing crowded between a man with a large girth and a woman with a small child pressed against her legs. They were probably her relatives, though Misao didn't know them.

A man in uniform announced them as direct family of Okina, and Aoshi as an adopted grandson. They bowed to the silent black sea dotted with faces. A few in the front looked as though they'd been crying, and the rest looked filled with respect of varying degrees.

The ceremony began. It was a tedious process. Omasu and Aoshi spoke briefly about Okina as a grandfather and a mentor. A few older men came up to talk about how they knew him in university and as colleagues. There was a woman whom Okina had saved when he was working as a young surgeon.

Misao felt the knot of emotion inside her quiver, trying to break free. Aoshi was standing on the other side of Omasu now, after coming down from the podium. A wave of despair hit her when she saw a lone tear streak down Kaoru's face. She knew she wasn't strong enough to keep from breaking down in front of those people.

Numbly, Misao tried to keep the image of Aoshi's face from shattering in her mind. It was no longer enough. As she followed the others to the small altar where they lit incense for Jiya, a tear slid down her cheek. Aoshi was there, handing her a stick of incense. His hand brushed hers in passing and she bit her lip, forcing the tears back. She bowed before the altar and slid her lit incense in along with the rest.

Then they made their way to the glass covered marble casket Misao and Kaoru had looked at earlier. It was no longer empty; Jiya's body was laid out beneath the glass. Misao's lip trembled as she stood by the glass. This would be the last time…no. Her thoughts prompted more tears to roll down her face.

"Jiya…" she breathed. She heard her whisper carry through the deathly silence in the hall. Somebody in the crowd let out a sob, quickly stifled. Misao instinctively reached out, for anything, anyone. Okon, standing beside her, grabbed her hand and gripped it tightly, tears falling from her own cheeks.

The old man looked….well, dead. His hands were bony and sharp angles stood out at his cheekbones, testimony to his long battle with cancer. His closed eyes looked peaceful though, and his thinned lips drew upwards in a soft smile. There was a pink bow in his beard. He was dressed in his favorite robes, and a photograph of his wife was clasped in his hands.

Misao couldn't stop it. The tears inside her exploded and she bit her lip hard to keep from crying out as her shoulders shook violently with suppressed sobs. Her tears felt like a torrent of sadness---tangible pain and sorrow. She broke away from Okon to go up to the casket. Leaning on the marble side, she placed her hands on the on the glass, feeling her tears splash onto her fingers.

"Jiya!" she wailed. All the tears Aoshi had helped her fight away came back. "No, no, no…" she whispered, clenching her fists against the glass cover.

"Misao…" Aoshi's voice came through her tears. He was standing on the other side of the casket. Gently, he took her hands in his and lifted them from the glass.

Misao looked up at Aoshi. For an instant, her tears cleared and she could see his face. Then her vision went blurry again and she gasped in the effort of holding in her sobs. She suddenly realized that she was in a hall full of people and they were all watching her. She wanted out.

Tearing away from Aoshi's hold, Misao stepped away from the casket and ran through the forest of flowers. She made sure to head for the other side of the crowd from where Kaoru was; she didn't want anybody coming after her. The crowd opened up for her as she plunged into it. She caught looks of pity and understanding, and many were weeping openly.

Misao was running. She stumbled free of the crowd and out the main doors of the hall. There were two or three attendants standing with candy jars, waiting. None tried to stop her; no doubt they'd seen people like her countless times. She cut across the front lobby of the funeral home and ran into another corridor.

Here, the marble floor was a rich emerald green with white streaks, and the walls were a lighter, softer green illuminated by natural light by way of the open windows. Misao walked slowly down the hallway, sobbing quietly now that she was alone. She gripped the necklace she wore, its cool stone pendant warming in her palm.

A doorway led out to a terraced walkway through the flower garden. Misao stepped outside, feeling the late morning breeze wash over her. There were pale pink roses climbing up vines around her, filling the air with sweet perfume. Misao took a deep breath and almost gagged. It was a sickly sweet scent to her, like the beautiful sunlight turned cruel.

She quickened her step and found her way off the walkway. Misao's eyes blurred once more and her tears burned down her cheeks as she saw lilies. A large bed of them, mostly white, scattered with pink and purple and yellow. She felt drawn towards them, and she dragged her hand across her eyes to walk toward the flowers.

Even as she cleared her tears away, fresh ones came. Misao caught her foot on the uneven ground and went flying with a cry. She curled up where she lay, sobbing openly. She reached out, just grasping the closest lily.

"Jiya…" clenching her fist around the plant, she dislodged a flower somehow. Clutching the bloom to her, Misao cried and cried. She knew nobody was around---any staff members of the funeral home wouldn't come to her---and nobody would come looking for her. Omasu and Okon couldn't leave the hall because they were the hosts, and Kaoru wasn't the kind of person who'd run through a crowd as she had. Aoshi…no, she couldn't expect him to look after her like that.

Misao sat up and hugged her knees to her chest, tears still slipping down her cheeks. Rocking back and forth, she cradled the white lily in her hand and felt an overwhelming sense of darkness and loneliness invade her. Time flowed around her and she was lost.

"Misao," somebody was touching her shoulder. "Misao, come on." The familiar scent of Aoshi's aftershave mixed with his own musky smell enveloped her, followed a moment later by his strong arms. Blissfully, Misao sank into his embrace, feeling her desolation seep way. She wondered briefly whether or not her grandfather would approve, but the thought slipped away as soon as it had come.

Aoshi held her and waited patiently until Misao's tears stopped and her breathing grew regular. She felt so…perfect in his arms. Sniffling slightly, Misao tried to push away from him, but he didn't let her. Instead, he tightened his hold ever so slightly.

"Feeling a little better now?"

Misao twisted to look up at Aoshi. He was kneeling on the ground, his arms securing her across his legs. Misao nodded, blushing fiercely. She saw dust and dirt from the ground on her clothes, and she knew her face must look like a mess.

"Go to the washroom and clean up," Aoshi suggested as if reading her mind. "I'll wait for you."

"Okay," Misao winced at the croak of her voice. Aoshi released her. Clambering to her feet quickly, Misao gave a vain attempt in brushing the dust off her knees. She headed inside for the washrooms, not noticing the flower that fell to the ground behind her.

Once inside the ladies' room, Misao let out a shuddering breath. She rinsed her hands, then splashed water on her face. As she dried with a paper towel, Misao frowned at the red-eyed, tousled, haunted-looking girl that stared back at her in the mirror. Shaking her head, she turned to the task of doing a more thorough job of cleaning her clothes.

As she checked herself over for dust she might have missed, Kaoru burst in.

"Misao-chan!" She threw her arms around her startled friend. "I was _so_ worried about you! What happened? Aoshi-san's talking to Okon in the hall---oh, Misao!"

"Ah…slow down," Misao extracted herself from Kaoru's hold, noting with some relief that her voice was more or less back to normal.

"Okay, listen," Kaoru said more carefully, "I'm really sorry I can't stay with you, but Yahiko just called. My dad came home early from his business trip and I have to go home."

"Oh okay, that's fine," Misao assured her friend, "I'll be fine. You go home and don't worry about me." She even felt confident enough to smile slightly.

"I suppose so…" Kaoru agreed with a sigh, "Aoshi-san will take care of you." Her lips twisted into a wicked smile.

"What's that supposed to mean?' Misao smacked Kaoru's arm playfully, cursing silently the blush that came creeping across her cheeks.

"Nothing, nothing," Kaoru fluttered her hand at Misao with a twinkle in her eye. "But y'know, I'm usually right about these things. Remember Soujiro-kun?"

Misao growled something inappropriate and threw a scrunched paper towel at her friend.

"Anyway," Kaoru added more seriously, "Do be careful with yourself. Don't stress out. If you need anything, call."

"'Kay, thanks," Misao grinned. "You better get going," she reminded Kaoru.

"Holy crap, yes!" Kaoru looked at her watch and winced. "Bye!"

"See you."

Misao waited another little while before leaving the washroom. Just as she was reaching for the door, she heard a little hiccup. Peering into the back of the washroom, she saw the end stall was closed. A pair of small feet hung, just short of touching the ground. Misao heard another little hiccup and left quickly, feeling something tug rather painfully at her own heart.

Aoshi was leaning against the wall outside, waiting for her like he said he would. A girl who looked suspiciously like Omasu was hurrying down the hall in the other direction.

"Hey, thanks for waiting," Misao said as brightly as she could.

"Mm," Aoshi's reply was typical, as far as she knew, but she felt a touch of disappointment. What had she expected? She pushed it away.

"Eh," Misao noticed that Aoshi was staring at her strangely. "Um…heh I look like a mess don't I?" She patted down her tousled bangs.

"No, you look fine," Aoshi assured her in his quiet voice. He seemed to hesitate, then stepped forward. Misao froze, standing perfectly still as Aoshi tucked a white lily into her hair. His hand lingered against her cheek for a few seconds more than was necessary.

"Eto…" Misao knew she was blushing furiously by the time Aoshi stepped away to inspect his work.

"You look quite pretty actually," he remarked casually. "Come on, let's go." Turning, he headed down the hall without waiting for her.

Misao hurried to catch up with him. Her heart was hammering and her face still flushed. She was also quite bothered by the fact that Kaoru was right. She _did_ have something serious for Aoshi. What would cause the most trouble was that she had no idea how he felt. There was a nagging idea in her head that suggested Aoshi still saw her as the little girl he'd had to take care of.

"Um, where exactly are we going?" Misao looked around. They were outside now, heading for Omasu's car, but there was no sign of the two older girls.

"Omasu came to inform me of a change of plans while you were washing up," Aoshi explained, taking the keys to the car out of his pocket. "They'll go through with the ceremony at the temple. The funeral house offered shuttle busses or something for a lower price since there are so many people."

"What about us?"

"I figured you wouldn't like to go there, seeing your state of mind in the hall," Aoshi replied more quietly. Misao had to strain to hear him. "We're going…somewhere else."

"What do you mean?" Misao was trotting to keep up with Aoshi's brisk stride. When he suddenly stopped about ten paces from the car, she crashed into him.

"Do you remember anything about your parents?" Aoshi turned to face her, his eyes dark green pools with an endless depth. "Or even earlier than that?"

"Huh?" Misao took a little while to process his questions, then another prolonged moment to formulate an answer. "Well I know what they looked like; there are pictures and stuff all over the house. I think…Jiya told me I fell down the stairs sometime just before I turned nine, and I forgot almost everything that happened before then."

"I see."

"Why?"

Aoshi went to open the driver's side door in Omasu's car. Misao hurried to get in the other side. Once she was seated and buckled up, Aoshi placed a silk drawstring pouch, about the size of an orange but lumpier, in her lap.

"Okina-san's ashes," he said as he started the car, "Or, some of it. You missed the cremation. And the rest was taken to the temple."

Misao gaped at him. The truth be told, she'd been dreading the temple ceremonies so much that she'd put it entirely out of her mind until now. How could she expect to stand prim and proper in a temple as remains of her grandfather were poured into an urn and stuffed into a niche to be sealed behind a slab of marble? Aoshi knew how she felt, and was offering her a way out. Something warm and fizzy bubbled inside the pit of her stomach.

"Thank you. Thank you _so_ much,' she finally breathed, holding the silk pouch tightly. The blue eyes that found Aoshi's were still pink from crying but the gratitude and love sparkled. Aoshi's lips twitched upwards in one of his rare smiles.

Misao was still shaking inside as Aoshi turned onto the highway. She tried to calm the excitement and quivering hopefulness growing inside her. So, she had a crush on him. Maybe even more. And she still couldn't work up the courage to ask what he felt.

Misao suddenly felt exhausted. She tried to stifle a yawn, but Aoshi noticed anyways---it was one of those slightly irritating things about him; if he took an interest, he noticed everything.

"Try to sleep a while," he suggested, taking his eyes off the road to glance at her briefly. "I'll wake you when we're there."

"Are you sure?" Misao was more than ready to obey him.

"Of course. You need rest and I have survived about a decade without your constant presence in my life." Aoshi told her.

"Did you just…make a joke?" Misao was already closing her eyes.

"No, I meant it," he told her dryly. "I _have_ survived."

"Mm…"

"But only…just barely."

Misao's eyes flew open at the last, whispered words. Looking over at Aoshi, she found him concentrating on driving, not a scrap of his attention left on her. Frowning, she closed her eyes again, dropping into a troubled sleep.

xxxXxxx

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	11. For The Longest Time

Notes: short chapter, this one. The next one will be LOOONG. I think. Enjoy!

xxXxxCHAPTER 11xxXxx

"Misao," Aoshi's voice woke her, "We're here."

"Nnnn, where's here?"

"You'll see," he replied vaguely, getting out of the car.

Misao grumbled as she hopped out, stretching stiff muscles. Glancing at her watch, she realized it was already nearing 3 pm. She guessed they'd been on the road for about two hours, maybe more.

"Hungry?" Aoshi appeared behind her.

"I---" Just as she was about to say she was fine, her stomach made a complaint---one step ahead of her. "I guess so," She laughed sheepishly.

Aoshi smiled slightly and walked away, leaving Misao scrambling to follow, her cheeks tinged pink.

They stopped at a stall where an old lady was selling dumplings and tea. Aoshi paid for food and Misao helped him carry it over to a large boulder nearby.

As she ate ravenously---to Aoshi's mute but rather obvious amusement---Misao surveyed her surroundings. They were out in the countryside, in a small town. The place was vaguely familiar to her eyes, though Misao was sure she'd never been there before. Or…had she?

Images flickered into her mind, as though they were somebody else's memories. A little boy came running own the street in a dirty shirt, chasing a yapping dog. Not far behind him, an older girl called to him, clutching her skirt as she ran. The noise distracted Misao from her thoughts and the images scattered.

"Something wrong, Misao?" Aoshi noted her frown of concentration as he handed her a serviette.

"No, I'm fine," she replied absently, trying to grasp the memories she'd lost. "Have I…been here before? 'Cause I seem to find it a bit familiar but maybe its just reminding me of somewhere else, like that time Jiya took us to Hokkaido or something."

"You've been here," Aoshi told her, gathering their garbage and heading for the nearest disposal unit. "You…I don't think you remember much from that time."

"Oh, I see," Misao got up and went to stand beside him. "So why are we here?"

"Did you bring his ashes?" Aoshi inquired instead. There was no need to as who 'he' was. Misao held up the silk pouch. "Good. Okina-san always said---well, you'll see. I wanted to show you something too."

"…okay, sure," Misao fell into step beside Aoshi as he walked down the unpaved street.

"They sky's beautiful and clear today, don't you think?" Aoshi remarked nonchalantly. After Misao had gotten over her surprise of Aoshi speaking without her prompting, she looked up. The sky was blue, with thin wisps of cloud dragged across it. Another image came to her, one of a sparkling lake under a sky just like the one she saw now. Someone was holding her hand and she smelled lilacs.

With a gasp, Misao tripped on a rock on the ground and lurched forward. Aoshi was there, catching her and gently steadying her.

"I think I must've come here before I fell down those stairs," Misao told him once she was on her feet once more. "It's like remembering stuff someone else saw, but now I'm sure of it."

"What did you remember," Aoshi sounded almost anxious, or maybe he was eager.

"Is there a lake around here?" Misao asked him as they started walking again.

"Yes," he replied a bit too quickly, and something very much like excitement flashed in his eyes. "We're going there right now."

"Oh, okay," Misao didn't really notice; she was too busy trying to dredge up more memories. She remembered something, "Aoshi you've been with us since I was born right?"

"Yes."

"Thought so. Jiya was always telling me how you used to baby sit me," Misao didn't see the look that crossed Aoshi's face. "So you must know what happened before I had that accident to make me forget," Misao continued, "Do you think you could tell me some?" It might make me remember."

"You never fell down any stairs," Aoshi said sharply, making Misao flinch back, halting in the middle of the road. Aoshi had quickened his pace, his long strides taking him around a corner and out of sight. Unnerved, Misao ran to catch up, not wanting to be left alone there.

"Aoshi, wait!" she called as she turned the corner and saw his tall figure moving further and further away. "Aoshi! Come on, please!" Growling at her restricting clothes, Misao broke into a sprint. She was fast, and she caught up to Aoshi.

"Aoshi what do you mean?" she gasped, trying to breath and talk and keep up with his brisk pace at the same time. "Why would Jiya lie to me? I _did_ fall down the stairs; I must've, or I'd remember stuff from when I was younger."

Aoshi whirled around suddenly, his hands on her shoulders to keep her from crashing into him. "The do you remember my brothers?"

"Yes," Misao replied in surprise, unable to pry her gaze from Aoshi's, "And Hyottoko-kun and Shikijo-kun. But come to think of it, I only remembered for real the night you brought me to the beach. The night right after Jiya died."

"Remembered for real?"

"Yeah, I mean, I knew who they were from photos and people talking about them, but that time it was my own memory. Nobody could have told me that."

"I see," Aoshi was already turning away now. "I finally understand."

"Understand what?" Misao trotted after him again. "_I_ don't understand. What's with you today?"

"You did not fall down the stairs and lose your memory," Aoshi spoke as he walked, words jolting slightly with his movement. "You lost your memory after the funeral for your parents."

"What?"

"We never kept from you the fact that they were killed in a car accident when you were eight," Aoshi's words were going as fast as his walking pace and Misao struggled to keep up with both. "But after you saw your mother's body in the hospital then, you went crazy."

"I don't remember any of that," Misao protested, but Aoshi kept talking.

"Your father hadn't been killed in the accident; he died in the hospital a bit later from his injuries," Aoshi slowed his pace gradually. "He spoke to you and me before he fell unconscious again, do you remember?"

"No, I---" Misao stopped suddenly. They had arrived at the lake.

It was a small lake, and Misao could see the forested shore on the other side. Three fishing boats were out on the still water, and birds swooped over the water or bobbed in it. Something whirled in Misao's brain. She ran as fast as she could off the road, down the hill, across the gravel beach, and out onto the dock. There was a small rowboat moored there, the benches inside painted light yellow.

Misao reached a hand out and ran a hand over the smoothed wood, on her knees on the dock. The remembered smell of lilacs swirled around her and a flood of images coursed through her mind.

Lilacs and death. Blood and key chains. Pink ribbons and ashes.

Misao let out an anguished scream that rang across the lake and up into the cruelly clear sky.

xxxXxxx

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	12. Memories On The Lake

Notes: Okay here we go. This isn't as long as I thought it would be haha but okay. Now, I have no idea whether there's actually a small-ish town outside Kyoto with a lake and stuff in it, but! we will pretend. –grin- (PS if anybody tears manages to tear up or sniffle or anything of the sort during this chapter please let me know. Just to make me feel better because im the –author- and I was almost cyring XD even like the happier parts messed me up majorly)

xxXxxCHAPTER 12xxXxx

"Misao! Misao…"

Someone was calling her from far away. Misao was floating in a bubble, suspended in darkness. _Hannya-kun…he's never coming back here. _All around her, long-lost memories whipped through the darkness. She fought to grab them as they flew past, pulling them to her so she could remember. What else had she lost? Where was her past?

_You fell down the stairs accidentally when you were about nine. _That was what Jiya had said.

_You lost your memory after the funeral for your parents, _Aoshi had said, _We never kept from you the fact that they were killed in a car accident. _

A streak of white. Misao spilled herself into the memory of white tiles and walls and ceilings, blue curtains, and beeping machines. White-clad nurses and blue-robed doctors rushed back and forth with trays and clipboards and stethoscopes. _Come quickly,_ someone said, _We're losing him. He's calling for his daughter._

Misao screamed as the pain of the memory seared through her. _Put this all behind you, Misao-chan. Lead a happy life and forget all the grief. Don't cry, your Aoshi-sama will be there with you. He'll stay by your side and hold your hand, I know he will. _

"Aoshi-sama…" she whispered, reaching out for another memory.

_Hannya-kun and Beshimi-kun went on a long journey, Misao-chan. Shikijo and Hyottoko too. Don't cry, look. Your Aoshi-sama is still here. He's going to stay with you forever, don't you worry. _

Misao smelled lilacs. The forgotten scent came with a soft lavender kimono, a smoothed wooden bench painted light yellow in a swaying boat, and four black silk pouches, two large ones and two small ones.

_Mommy, what are those for? _

_To bring them good luck on their journey. Go on, throw it into the water. They'll find it in all the rivers and streams, all the seas and oceans, and in every little raindrop. _

_Aoshi-sama, don't you miss them? _

_Yes, Misao, I miss them. _

_You won't leave me too, will you? _

_No. Your mother is right. I'll be with you forever. _

"Aoshi-sama!" Misao cried, reaching out into the darkness.

"I'm here, Misao," that deep voice rumbled through her, "I'm here."

She opened her eyes.

Misao found herself in Aoshi's arms. She was arranged across his lap, her hands fisted against his shoulders, face buried in his chest. He was stroking her hair with one hand and his other arm was wrapped around her. They were still on the dock, the rowboat with yellow benches still bobbing happily in the water. The silk pouch sat on the wooden planks beside them.

"I remember…" Misao croaked hoarsely, "I remember it all. My parents, the hospital…" Tears flowed down her face once more and Aoshi pulled her closer. "I remember Hannya-kun and the others. I remember coming to this lake to scatter their ashes. Then Jiya brought us here to scatter my parents' ashes."

"How are you feeling?" Aoshi asked, tipping her face up so he could look at her.

Misao drew a shaky breath, wiping her eyes with the back of her hand. "I'll be fine." She extracted herself from Aoshi and carefully stood up. Aoshi followed suite, a considerable amount more gracefully.

"Don't you _ever_ scare me like that again," Aoshi hissed, making Misao flinch at the hardness in his words. He softened his tone before continuing, "You just ran off, and then I heard you scream I thought you'd never stop screaming."

"Sorry…" Misao murmured, looking down.

"No, don't apologize," Aoshi put a hand on her shoulder. "I should have known this would make you remember. That's partly why I brought you here. But for a few minutes, I was terrified, Misao. I---"

He was cut off by Misao throwing herself at him. Staggering back slightly, he drew her close to him, holding her tightly. Misao murmured something into his chest but the words were muffled.

"Hm?" Aoshi gently held her away from him so she could speak clearly.

"I said, I remember other things too," Misao told him. "I remember when Hannya-kun would tease you because you always wanted to bring me along wherever you guys went. And you'd tease him back because he always came to kiss me goodnight."

"That's true," Aoshi even looked the slightest bit embarrassed. Misao grinned and continued.

"Hannya-kun and Hyottoko-kun always carried me on their shoulders and then you'd get jealous," she turned away and stood facing the water. "Except whenever you did carry me, I'd fall asleep and start falling off."

"You were comfortable then," Aoshi observed dryly, coming up behind her and resting his hands on her shoulders.

"I was," Misao said, lost in happier memories. "I remember always running my hands through your hair. I liked the smell of your shampoo too."

Misao froze when Aoshi's head suddenly appeared on her shoulder. "I haven't changed shampoo," he informed her with a wicked tone.

"Let's see," Misao murmured absently, not realizing what she was doing. Reaching back with one hand, she twirled a strand of Aoshi's black hair around her finger. Tilting her head back, she caught its scent. It smelled like dark green forests and rain. "Mmmm…I can't believe how much I've missed that, without even knowing it."

Abruptly, Aoshi stepped away, taking his warmth with him. Misao came to her senses, blushing furiously, and trembling with the awareness of how close he'd been.

"You know," Aoshi said softly, "I've missed it too." Misao turned to look at him in surprise. He continued, "On his deathbed, your father told you to put your grief behind you and live a happy life. After the funeral, you spent a whole week hiding in your room. After that, you really forgot everything that had happened. You barely even remembered your own birthday."

"I can remember how hard it was,' Misao remarked quietly, "Ripping all my memories out of myself and forcing myself to forget what had happened. It was strange, up until now, all my memories were just other people's words and old photo albums."

"It hurt me too," Aoshi's voice was so soft Misao had to struggle to hear him. "I watched as the little Misao-chan I---loved---fade away and…you forgot me. You stopped saying –sama or even –kun. Over the years, we barely spoke. I watched you grow, laugh, date somebody else, and now Okina-san is gone. I cannot lose you too, now that I've waited so long."

"Oh…" Misao was stunned. "I didn't---I didn't realize."

"Of course not; I didn't want you to." He turned and went back towards the beach.

"Huh? Wait!" Misao scrambled to follow.

"I'll be back. _Wait for me._"

"Ah…" she stopped where she was and watched Aoshi walk away towards the houses. Misao walked back to the end of the dock to pick up the silk drawstring pouch. Staring out across the lake, she thought about Aoshi's words. She thought about her newly recovered memories. She thought about her grandfather's death. She thought about herself: her heart, her soul, her life.

Misao felt something open up like a window inside her, letting sunlight pour in. The clear sky and golden sunlight were no longer cruel and mocking in the wake of death; it was now a promise of peace and new life to come.

"Makimachi-san's girl," a rumbling voice made her turn. An old man stood there, Aoshi beside him. The wrinkled face was vaguely familiar to Misao.

"Hai," she replied politely.

"This is Yagami-san," Aoshi said, "Your father's mentor and friend."

"It's been ten years," Yagami-san remarked. "You've become a fine young lady. Aoshi is a lucky man."

Misao blushed," Oh, no, well---um…thanks."

"Oh yes, and I'm very sorry about your grandfather," Yagami-san gave a polite bow, "He was a very good man."

"Thank you," Misao returned the bow and smiled.

"Yagami-san agreed to let us borrow his boat for a while," Aoshi told her, "We used his boat for my brothers' and your parents' funerals as ell."

"Yes," Misao glanced back at the boat with its yellow benches, "I remember."

"Good," Aoshi took keys from Yagami-san and they went to untie the ropes which moored the boat to the dock. "I want to have this done so we can go back in time."

Misao looked at her watch. 4:28pm. "Oh…okay…"

"Here, girl, wind it up," Yagami-san handed her a rope. Misao obeyed. "Won't you stay 'til evening? My wife would love to have you here for supper."

"Thank you, but no, we really must---"

Today is our mayor's 60th birthday," Yagami-san handed Misao a second rope as he cut Aoshi off. "We are a small community, but we all know each other well. We will have fireworks out here tonight, to celebrate."

"Fireworks?" Misao's eyes lit up and she almost dropped the neatly coiled rope in her hands. "Aoshi, can we stay? Please?"

"You see?" Yagami-san winked. "It is a fine idea. You can use our phone to let everybody at home know you'll be back later."

Aoshi looked thoughtful for a moment. He frowned. Misao Held her breath.

"Fine," he finally said, "We will stay for the fireworks."

"Yes!!" Misao laughed, grabbing Aoshi's hand, "It'll be like a date!" She quickly clapped her hands over her mouth, blushing furiously.

"That sounds fine to me," Aoshi smiled, reaching to smooth the top of Misao's hair. The girl slowly let her hands fall, blue eyes shining and her lips parted slightly. Her blush faded to a pretty light pink.

"Let's go," Aoshi took the silk pouch from her and steered Misao towards the boat. He steadied her as she stepped into the wobbling craft, and then got in himself. When they were both seated, Yagami-san showed Aoshi how to work the motor, then gave them a small push off.

"Thanks!" Misao called gleefully, waving at the old man as the boat left the dock behind. Yagami-san held up a hand in answer.

xxxXxxx

lilkagome14: hey there lol. Guess what? Even _I_ don't know where exactly the climax is O.o oh my…hahahaha. You'll have to decide for me. Maybe it was this chapter. Or maybe there's more than one climax...haha so its like a .../\.../\...o.o two climaxes. ah'em. anyways!

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	13. A Moment Like This

Notes: Okay, this one is…nice. Slightly random and slightly cute, whatever you wanna say it is. Or maybe it's slightly OOC, but that's okay we can pretend it's a perfect world...or something... This is another one of those that I don't really like the way it turned out but I'm through with fixing it. Please accept my apologies for not getting it typed up faster; I guess I didn't have as much time to spare as I thought I did. Anyways, here you go!

xxXxxCHAPTER 13xxXxx

Once they were out near the middle of the lake, away from the other boats, Aoshi cut the engine. Misao was still gazing open-mouthed around her. He nudged her with his foot and handed her the silk pouch.

"It's beautiful out here, isn't it?" Misao breathed as she carefully undid the strings to open the pouch. "Jiya…gods bless." Taking a deep breath, she drew out a handful of gritty grey ashes. Tossing it into the wind, she laughed and cried out "Jiya!" as tears flowed down her cheeks in the most unexplainable combination of sorrow and joy. She offered the pouch to Aoshi.

He took it from her shaking fingers, drawing out his own handful. Carefully, he let the dust trickle out of his fingers and into the water, lips moving as me murmured a prayer. Then he handed the pouch back to Misao.

"Hey, um…"

"Yes?"

"Nothing."

Aoshi raised an eyebrow. Misao met his gaze and---burst out laughing. Aoshi could not keep the surprised expression off his face.

"Do it---do it again!" Misao choked in between giggles.

Aoshi stared at her, then obliged and raised the other eyebrow. Misao's laughter echoed across the lake like the pealing of bells. The three fishermen in the nearest boat looked over and returned Misao's wave.

"Stop laughing," Aoshi ordered sternly. Misao obeyed---of course---but the pink stayed across her cheeks and she was still breathless from laughing.

"But you look so _funny_!" a giggle escaped and Misao covered her mouth with her hand.

"There are ashes on your hand," Aoshi pointed out stoically.

"Oops!" Misao switched hands and trailed her ashy one in the water. She lifted it carefully, cupping water, and flicked it at Aoshi. "Better?" she help up her wet fingers and wiggled them.

"There's some on your face," Aoshi calmly brushed water droplets from his face and reached for Misao. She held perfectly still as his wet fingers came in contact with her cheek and wiped away a smudge of ash. "Better."

Misao blushed furiously, then muttered, "Thanks." She opened her mouth again as if to say something more, but turned away.

The glee on her face vanished and she would not meet Aoshi's gaze. "Why---why are you doing all this for me?" she asked, her voice serious.

"What do you mean?"

"You spent all that time with me before, and brought me here, and…well…" Misao looked at him, her gaze burning. "I like you."

"What…?"

"I said _I like you_!" Misao blurted, frustrated by Aoshi's response. "As in, I have a crush on you, I think you're hot, I'm crazy about you and…I'm in love with you."

Misao was completely unprepared for what happened next. Aoshi _laughed_. He chuckled and cackled and _laughed_. After he calmed himself with a deep breath, he turned shining eyes on an open-mouthed and startled Misao.

"It's amazing how you're always so open," he told her wryly, his eyes still laughing. Then he grew serious. "As for your earlier question, I---" he stopped.

"What?" Misao poked him impatiently.

"I lost my parents, then my brothers, and my foster parents. Now even Okina-san is gone. You may have had forgotten your past, as well as everything we shared, but I could not lose you," Aoshi cast his gaze out across the lake, looking anywhere but at Misao. "I didn't really know what would come of it. I didn't even know if you would be able to regain those memories. But even still…"

"Still…?"

"I had to try. You're all I have left, Misao. All this time, I watched you grow up and change but I couldn't share any of your happiness. I was always trapped in the past, thinking about how things were before." He abruptly turned to face Misao, his eyes piercing, as if begging her to understand. "When you lost your memories, Okina-san made us swear on everything we had not to tell you. We continued as if nothing had ever happened. We told you about your parents and my brothers, but you were young enough for it not to matter that you had no real memories."

"So that's why nobody ever told me. Jiya even told me that I'd fallen down the stairs," Misao said softly. "It feels strange, like I've lived two different lives and now its coming together…"

"I wanted to tell you," Aoshi said in a quietly intense tone, "But I could not. I saw reason in why he didn't allow us to."

"Why now, then?"

"Okina-san is no longer with us," Aoshi replied, "No offense meant. I figured you are old enough now. And I wanted you back, Misao. I wanted _my _Misao-chan, the one who smiled for _me_ and _loved_ me."

"Er…" Misao blushed. "I just told you that I…like…you…"

Aoshi contemplated for a moment and raised an eyebrow.

Misao blinked and burst out laughing. "Fine! I _love_ you, alright? Is that what you want to hear?"

"Yes," Aoshi smiled, "It is."

Misao blushed again. "Well that's great. Umm…so…what do you um…"

"Let's just consider your feelings returned," Aoshi reveled in the sparkling surprise that lit up Misao's face.

"For real?"

"Would I lie to you about it?"

Misao shook her head fervently. "So, then, umm…what's going to happen?"

Aoshi looked around. The other boats were heading back to shore as twilight faded to dusk. "We're going to go back, and we're going to eat dinner at Yagami-san's house, after which we will go to see the fireworks and then go home." Aoshi proceeded to turn the boat's engine on.

As the motor roared to life, he caught Misao's mutter of "That's not what I meant---" before the sound drowned out the rest.

After they tied up the boat with the help from a nearby fisherman, Aoshi and Misao stood on the dock, staring out across the lake. The sun was setting over the hills on the opposite shore and the reflection of the sky set the water aflame.

"Close your eyes, Misao,' Aoshi instructed; she obeyed. Moving to stand behind her, Aoshi pulled something out of his pocket. Misao felt something cold and slightly heavy drop over her head to hang around her neck.

"Can I open my eyes yet?"

"No."

"Why not? Aren't you done?"

Aoshi stepped forward to slide his arms around Misao's waist. The girl stiffened against him, then slowly relaxed, her slim frame fitting perfectly against his well-built one.

"Ano…"

"I remember when you started to go out with Soujiro." Aoshi said thoughtfully, his chin resting on the top of Misao's head. "You told us all about that bracelet he gave you as a---what did you call it?"

"First date present?" Misao supplied hesitantly.

"Yes, that's it," Aoshi took his chin away and raised one hand to tweak the pin sash in Misao's hair. "I would probably have given this to you anyway, but perhaps this would make a better reason."

"First…date?" Misao asked in a _very_ quiet voice.

"Is there a problem?" Aoshi smirked.

"Can I open my eyes yet?"

"Yes." He released her. As soon as his arms fell from her waist, Misao whirled around to face him. She held up the two silver pieces that hung from the thin silver chain around her neck.

"Beshimi," Misao read the engraved characters on one, then squinted at the other, more scratched one, "Hannya." She gasped and her eyes lit up at the memory.

"How do you like it?"

"I _love_ you!" she gushed, running her fingers along the thin silver. "I remembered these but I didn't ask about them 'cause I thought it was me who'd lost them."

"I took them," Aoshi confessed, "Because you were not to remember."

"That's okay then," Misao grinned. "Thank you _so _much."

"You're very welcome," Aoshi took a step back and gave her an elegant bow. He had barely straightened up again when Misao threw herself at him, nearly knocking both of them off the dock.

"Does this mean we're officially on a date?" Misao asked breathlessly, looking up at Aoshi.

"Yes, I suppose so,' Aoshi smiled at his first-ever girlfriend, drawing her back against him. Misao shifted a bit, making sure her silk pouch was still securely looped around her wrist by the strings.

"What's wrong, Misao?" Aoshi sensed the giddiness leave Misao.

"Do you think…do you think Jiya would be upset?" Misao asked in a small voice. She sighed, "It's his funeral day and here I am, having fun on a---a date."

"I don't think he'd be upset," Aoshi told her firmly. "I remember how hard it was for him to watch you forget everything and become like another little girl. He would be happy for you, Misao. Trust me."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Alright then," she relaxed, sounding a considerable bit relieved. "Thanks, Jiya," she whispered.

"Come on then," Aoshi pulled away and turned towards the beach. "Yagami-san is waiting."

"Oh right," Misao ran to catch up, slipping her hand into Aoshi's almost automatically. He laced his long fingers through hers, and looked at her in the gathering dusk. She grinned up at him and he smiled back.

"Let's go."

Misao squeaked when Aoshi began to run, his long legs propelling him forward. She laughed and quickened her own pace in order to catch up, feeling him slow from his original burst of speed to match hers. They made their way through the small town, with its widely spaced out houses and uneven gravel roads.

Finally, Aoshi slowed and they made their way, hand in hand, up a slightly inclined path leading up to a modest, one-storey house. Catching their breaths, they passed through a neat fence that showed dark green in the garden lights. Aoshi had just raised his hand to knock on the door when somebody opened it from the other side. A smiling Yagami-san ushered then inside, saving a wink for Misao.

"I'm sorry we're a bit late," Misao plopped onto the couch beside Aoshi when Yagami-san offered her the seat.

"You ran here, I see," The old man smiled at them, the corners of his eyes crinkling.

"Yeah," Misao laughed.

"It's a good thing we eat late most of the time then," Yagami-san's wife swept out of the kitchen holding a cluster of chopsticks and two plates. "You're just in time."

Misao jumped up to help the plump woman set the table and carry in more dishes. Aoshi remained on the couch talking to the older man.

"You've grown up so much, Misao-chan," her hostess remarked as she scooped rice into bowls. "I remember when you were barely taller than our counter."

"I'm sorry," Misao grinned sheepishly, "I don't remember."

"Of course not," the old woman smiled, "You were not even eight yet. You were the sweetest little girl I'd ever met."

"Oh thank you. Kazuko-san, right?"

"That's what you always called me." Kazuko laughed. "Sweet as always." She turned to Aoshi and his host. "Come and eat!"

The men came to the table as summoned. They ate the hearty meal Kazuko had prepared for them, chatting about happy things. Misao laughed at their hosts' descriptions of her as a child, while Aoshi shared warm glances with her across the table, making her heart leap once and again.

Aoshi cell phone rang just as they were finishing. He dug it out of his pocket and glanced at the display.

"It's Omasu," he announced.

"Oh crap! We totally forgot about calling her!" Misao exclaimed.

"I'll take care of it," Aoshi excused himself from the table and answered the callas he stepped into the next room. Misao helped clear the dishes and bring them into the kitchen.

"The dishes can wait, Misao-chan," Kazuko herded the girl out of the room. "We'll miss the beginning if we don't leave now."

Aoshi joined them at the front door and the four of them headed out into the starlit evening. The elderly couple walked a bit ahead, arm in arm, leaving Misao and Aoshi together to bring up the rear.

"Here you go," Aoshi pressed a pair of keys into Misao's hand. "My room and the front door. Those are Hannya's. I lost my original ones so I ended up using the ones Beshimi was supposed to have."

"Oh, okay thanks," Misao put the keys in her pocket and reached tentatively for Aoshi's hand. He wrapped his long fingers around hers and gave them a reassuring squeeze. They quickened their pace slightly to catch up with the others.

Once they were gathered on the beach with the other residents of the community, Yagami-san turned to them. "Will you two be alright?" he asked, "We're going to socialize a bit."

"Yes, you go ahead," Misao replied politely," We'll be fine."

"Here, you can sit on this," Kazuko handed them a blanket, "So you don't get your nice black things sandy." Misao thanked her and they walked away into the night.

xxxXxxx

TheUniverseBeyond: thanks for remembering mee!! I heart you. I'll review, I promise! Christmas holidays are coming up for me soon and I'll have time to do stuff. :D

lilkagome14: ooh hey there. go get some rest, darling. whats CBA is that you or is it like another person.

Fantasyaddict: ooh...haha...well thanks. Reading your review convinced me that what I was writing actually...made sense!

Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin storyline and characters belong to Watsuki-san. Standard disclaimers apply

PLEASE REVIEW!


	14. Time Is Standing Still

Notes: argh! I offer my most sincere apologies for NOT UPDATING. -dies- I hate myself for neglecting this for so long especially since I had this chapter done on my computer a while ago. Please please please keep on going I'm sooo sorry. And yes this may look like the end, but I'm making an epilogue. or two. because the end of this chap sucks. I also think I'm going to work on chapter titles for this story. because I'm cool that way

xxXxxCHAPTER 14xxXxx

Aoshi found a spot at the top of the sloped beach where the sand and gravel met a long grassy stretch. They laid the blanket out and made themselves comfortable. People were lighting lanterns that hung from long bamboo poles driven into the ground, so that nobody would be tripping in the darkness. About five minutes later, a bright signal flare came from across the lake. All lights on the beach were extinguished promptly.

The show began. Misao's delighted gasp was swallowed by the whistle and bang of the first fireworks, her eyes shining in the blues, reds, and yellows that lit up the night sky. Each shower of light in the sky was reflected in shimmering replica by the smooth surface of the lake. Aoshi put an arm around Misao and she snuggled up against him without thinking.

The mood didn't last, however. There was a volley of fireworks with a rapid succession of read and orange flares, popping like gunshots and echoing across the lake. Misao felt Aoshi stiffen and then shudder.

"Aoshi! What's wrong?" Misao wriggled to look up at his face. A terrible anger and sadness etched Aoshi's face as light from another round of fireworks cast it in sharp relief.

"I killed them Misao," he hissed into her ear. "My brothers, my friends. Our friends. It was my fault."

"What are you talking about?" Misao crawled behind Aoshi and wrapped her arms around his chest, feeling helpless distress spread through her.

"We were coming home from a movie late at night," Aoshi told her in a tight voice. "Hyottoko and Shikijo were coming to sleep over that night."

"I don't remember any of this," Misao felt a chill in her spine and pressed herself closer to Aoshi.

"Nobody told you. You were six," Aoshi explained tersely. "They were going to go down the streets, but I said we should cut through the park to save time. Hannya listened to me, so everybody else did too. There were some drunken psychopaths in the park and they had guns."

"What happened?" Misao whispered as the cold feeling grew stronger.

xxxx

_.Aoshi's flashback._

"_Is it just me or are there people in there?" Beshimi muttered, squinting to try to see in the darkness. They'd left the safety of the streetlights behind them as they stepped into the path through the park. _

"_You're right, there are," Hannya hissed. "Keep quiet."_

"_Aoshi nii-san's already so far ahead already," Beshimi could make out the tall figure of his older brother, white shirt floating in the night. _

"_I'll tell him," Hannya whispered. He turned to Shikijo and Hyottoko, "Watch my little brother."_

_He sprinted towards his other brother as his friends nodded in agreement. The abandoned nine-year-old's complaints were stifled behind Hyottoko's massive hand._

_Hannya reached Aoshi at around the same time he saw the other occupants of the park advancing towards them. When he felt his older brother's hand on his shoulder, Aoshi exchanged a glance of comprehension with him. One of the approaching figures let out a string of insults and curses, words slurred with alcohol. His companions roared in raucous laughter. _

_The two boys moved apart slightly, dropping into well-practiced martial-arts stances. Hannya's eyesight and reflexes were a touch better than his brother's, and when the first man pushed his hand into a bulky coat pocket the teen hissed to Aoshi, "Guns."_

_A second later there was a sharp click followed by the gunshot. Hannya stepped sideways and collided with Aoshi forcefully. The younger boy went flying and a bullet pierced his leg where his torso had been. Aoshi let out a cry as he crashed to the pavement. Hannya hollered something and Shikijo was there in an instant, asking Aoshi if he was alright and trying to lift him up from where he lay. The older boy roared in pain when a second volley of bullets hit him, rearing up to cover Aoshi's smaller form._

_Aoshi's vision blurred in pain and tears as Shikijo fell, his back a bloody ruin. Hyottoko was screaming, running, his giant build tackling the man with the gun and taking him out easily. Hannya was already gone from the scene, having run to the nearest house for help. Lights were already flashing on nearby in response to their sounds of distress, but not fast enough. Hyottoko was dead within seconds of his short victory as a second man pulled a gun._

_Beshimi darted out of the shadows when his friend, mentor and idol crumpled. Aoshi tried to call out to his little brother and hold him back but he was weak with pain and his legs would not move as he commanded. He watched helplessly as the frenzied boy flung rocks at the two remaining attackers and executed one of the football tackles that Hyottoko had been teaching him. His small body was flung backwards and peppered with bullets as Aoshi screamed._

_A dark shadow melted out of the darkness behind the two men. Aoshi saw through his tears a white mask with hideous fangs and glowing eyes like a demon, but it could have been an angel. Hannya's changed appearance startled the men enough for him to get one of them down, but his companion had his revolver aimed point blank at the youth's chest before he could make any further move._

"_Die."_

_Bright lights washed the scene as Hannya's lifeless form hit the ground. Aoshi's scream could be heard over the wail of police sirens and the loud commands of the officers. His world was ending. _

_.end of flashback._

xxxx

"Oh," Misao tried to stop the tears from falling as she held onto Aoshi, her cheek resting against his shoulder.

"I kept that mask. It was cracked but I got all the pieces. The police thought I was crazy," Aoshi shuddered again and something wet fell onto Misao's hand as a brilliant white firework bloomed in the sky. Tears glistened on his face and Misao's heart twisted painfully.

Sliding around to sit beside Aoshi again, she wiped the drops away with her fingers. "It's not your fault. It was a freak accident; how could you have known?"

"I should have just gone with the original plan to take the streets."

"No, you didn't know it would turn out like that," Misao told him sternly, wondering dryly to herself where her patronizing wisdom was coming from. "Do you think Hannya-kun would want you to be like this? Even if it _is_ your fault, he would forgive you. They all would, I'm sure of it."

"How can you say that?" Aoshi growled. "He was fourteen. _Fourteen_. Beshimi died when he was only _nine_."

"Does it matter?" Misao asked patiently, taking Aoshi's hand. "They will not find peace in death if you keep blaming yourself. So what's the point? Let them go. You can't bring back the dead. Think of the happy thing that you shared with them, and enjoy the present."

"The present," Aoshi sighed. "Yes. I have you now."

"That's right," Misao smiled. Aoshi slid an arm around her waist again, pressing her against him. She felt his breathing grow even as the fireworks flared to an exhilarating finale. Misao's heart soared when she looked up at Aoshi;' face and saw him smiling softly in the flashing colors of the fireworks. Perhaps today was a day for finding inner peace for them both.

Applause and cheering rose from the people scattered on the beach as the fireworks ended. One by one, the lamps were lit once more and people started to get up. Blankets were folded and rear ends dusted off, so Aoshi and Misao followed suite. Yagami-san and his wife found them soon after and invited them to join in the rest of the celebration. Aoshi declined politely but firmly, telling them that he and Misao had to get home. Kazuko saw them off, hugging Misao warmly. The girl smiled luminously in the night, although she was showing obvious signs of fatigue.

It was nearing 10:00pm when they reached the highway. Misao had her chin cupped in one hand as she stared out the window with unseeing eyes.

"How are you feeling " Aoshi reached one hand across to Misao's free hand. Without thinking, he laced his fingers through hers.

"I'm fine," she replied, turning to him with a tired smile. "I'm just exhausted."

"Then sleep," Aoshi suggested, raising their hands to brush her cheek with his knuckles.

Misao shook her head softly, "I don't want to."

"Oh?"

"I just want to…spend this time with you," she admitted seriously. "I can sleep when we get home."

"Of course," Aoshi agreed quietly.

"I wonder…what will the others think?" Misao mused quietly.

"I'm sure they'll be happy for you."

"That's not an answer, Aoshi," Misao frowned. "Remember this morning? Okon was getting all worked up about me spending so much time with you."

"I believe the problem was that we are still coping with Okina-san's death," Aoshi reminded her. "Besides, didn't she go talk to you in your room afterwards?"

"Well yes, but---"

"Then we have nothing to worry about," Aoshi assured her, giving her hand a gentle squeeze. "We'll tell them about it in a few weeks, maybe, when this isn't so fresh on our minds."

"You're right," Misao sighed happily. "It'll be okay."

"Yes, it will."

Hands intertwined, they sat together in the car as the city flowed past them. The shadows that passing streetlights cast upon them flew swiftly by like memories that were retreating back into the past, where they belonged. Even in the semi darkness, Misao's eyes shone with newfound happiness, shimmering blue like the sunlit surface of a lake---the same lake where the two of them had bid farewell to their darker memories and begun life anew. Together.

xxxXxxx

TheUniverseBeyond: omigosh YOU feel bad? -gasp-_ I _should feel bad. and i do -sniff- and...yeah real life is hardly ever this nice but that's why we have the stories right? It makes us feel better, I suppose.

Moonlight Shadow Alchemist: mm...I've made you wait -cries- gomenasaiii. If you're still reading this, you won't have to wait long for the next thing.

again, im hating myself for not updating sooner. I promised myself that I would never neglect a story because that ticks me off sometimes but..I guess I'm inconsistent. :)


	15. Epilogue: Part I

xxXxx Epilogue: Part I xxXxx

"Misao."

The girl roused from a darkness that was warm and safe. It seemed like an eternity since she'd slept so comfortably, even if this was just a short slumber. Misao opened her eyes reluctantly to see the familiar wall of the garage's interior. The car's engine was already off, keys dangling from Aoshi's fingers.

"Misao-chan!" Omasu came out of the house with a scowling Okon on her heels. "How was it?"

"Yeah, fine," Misao waved the concerned hands away from her and hopped out of the car as Okon held the door open.

"Are you hungry or anything?"

"No, I'm fine," Misao stretched her arms as she followed her cousins inside. By the time she got her shoes off and joined the other three in the kitchen, Aoshi was already pouring tea into four cups. Misao gratefully accepted the one that Omasu handed her and took a seat at the table.

"So how were the temple ceremonies?" Misao asked, just for the sake of having something to say. She, of course, didn't really care to know.

"Painfully boring," Okon grimaced. "Strict and rigid and _everything_ smelled like incense. I swear I was going to throw up right then and there."

"Don't be rude," Omasu chided, but her heart wasn't in it.

"I don't think it'll even wash out of my hair," Okon sniffed at the black strands that she was idly twirling around a finger. Then she looked up at Misao, her eyes sparkling teasingly. "And how was the lake, Misao-chan?"

"The air was fresh and I got to run around and splash water," Misao replied candidly, her face perfectly straight. "All in all, it was great out there."

"Haha, thanks for sharing." Okon returned dryly.

"I know, my sarcasm is…dead," Misao told her with a grin. "But I did get to see fireworks. I _really _wish I could have been with you guys." She shook her head in mock disappointment."

"I'm sure you do, and I _really_ wish I were a monk."

"Oh stop it," Omasu scolded, setting her cup down. Her scowl melted into curiosity. "So who were you splashing water at?" Okon leaned forward interestedly as Misao delayed her reply by sipping slowly from her own steaming cup.

"Well…?" Okon prodded.

"Guess."

Okon lifted her gaze to where Aoshi was standing by the counter, eyes widening with disbelief. The twenty-three-year-old acknowledged her with a raised eyebrow and Misao snorted into her cup.

"_Him?_ He actually _let_ you splash water at him?"

"Well, yes," Misao replied smugly. "Depends on what you mean by _letting_."

"No severe repercussions? I was so sure that Aoshi-kun would savagely punish anyone displaying that kind of behavior towards him." Omasu shook her head ruefully.

"I'm still alive," Misao pointed out with a giggle.

"Don't speak so soon, Misao." The girls all looked up. He leaned against the counter languidly and crooked a finger at his new girlfriend. "Come."

"Hm, what?" She complied unhurriedly, making her way across the kitchen with a casualness that matched his. Okon murmured something with awe.

Instead of replying, Aoshi reached behind him and turned the tap on. In a smooth motion that the girls' eyes failed to follow, he cupped his palm against the flow of water and flung it at Misao. She stood in shock with her lips parted and water droplets slipping down her face and hair.

"What…the hell."

Aoshi stood up straight and turned the tap off as Misao brushed water out of her eyes. She threw a punch at his arm and he caught her wrist on her second shot, yanking her close to him.

"Omasu was right. Not even my girlfriend can _mess_ with me like that without severe repercussions," his lips moved at her ear, words meant only for her to hear. Pushing her away again, he let his lips quirk up in a smile.

"Wow…" Okon breathed, probably not for the first time.

"Go take a shower, Misao-chan," Omasu put in smoothly, elbowing her sister sharply. "I'll clean up."

"Thank you," Aoshi returned politely, sliding his arm around Misao's shoulders and steering her towards the door. "Sorry for that." Misao looked back over her shoulder and caught Okon's wink. Her previous worries vanished promptly and she felt the closeness with her cousins more than ever before. She let Aoshi escort her up the stairs.

He left her at her bedroom door, telling her to get some rest after she showered, and then retreated to his own door at the end of the hall. Misao watched him unlock it with a clinking of keys and sighed as she opened her own door. The familiarity of her room greeted her warmly and the girl let out a sigh of relief.

Ten minutes later, Misao was in her pajamas, toweling her hair. She was wearing her pink nightgown tonight, the warmth from her shower still tingling inside her. Crossing the room from her bed to her computer, she proceeded to find some soft music to fill the empty silence.

"Hannya-kun…" She picked up the fading photograph in its black frame, half-hidden behind a stuffed animal on her shelf. She plucked a tissue out of the nearby box and gently brushed away the dust. Aided by her new memories, she closed her eyes and let herself drift back to a time of sunny days and innocence.

Misao hummed along to the song emitting from the computer speakers as her mind wandered. Her hands busied themselves with the mindless task of tidying her room. Clothes discarded carelessly on the floor were folded and returned to drawers or tossed into the hamper in the corner. Leaning towers of books were carefully taken down and lined back up on shelves with their spines in a more organized fashion.

One a quick trip back to the bathroom to drop off her tamp towel into its hook, Misao ran into Okon who was just putting her toothbrush away. The older girl offered to blow dry Misao's long hair for her, and Misao accepted with a smile. Perched on the edge of the bathtub with her hair hanging down her back, Misao's fingertips fiddled with the silver chain around her neck.

"So, it's time for some catching up, wouldn't you say?" Okon said pleasantly over the sound of the hair dryer.

"Mmm, girl talk," Misao returned. She raised her arms above her head and stretched luxuriantly, feeling her neck crack slightly.

"Stay still," Omasu chided softly. She carefully arranged the long tresses that tumbled messily over Misao's shoulders. "Why don't you start by telling me about your new um necklace?"

Misao told the other girl everything she could while Omasu murmured responses wherever necessary. They laughed together in the lighter moments and left silences for each other at just the right places. Misao couldn't decide which was more relieving, having someone to share her thoughts and feelings with or just being on good terms with Okon again. Tension that had gathered over the past few weeks dissipated from both girls and Misao couldn't remember the last time her heart had felt so light.

Their conversation continued even after Misao's hair was dry and brushed a hundred strokes. They moved from the vastly interesting topic of a certain stoic man's nature to the deeper topic of Misao's new memories. They talked about childhood times as the younger girl gurgled around her toothbrush and set them both giggling. Omasu poked her head in to say good night and gave Misao a warm hug. Finally, Okon and Misao parted way to their respective rooms.

Her light was still on and music still playing, so Misao took a clip from the mess on her desk and pulled her hair up to keep it out of her way as she continued her cleaning. Countless stuffed animals she'd amassed over the years were carefully sorted and arranged on her bed, shelves, and the rest in a mountain in the corner of the room. Misao slumped into her desk chair at some time just past midnight, deciding firmly that she would leave the cleaning of her desk for another day as she turned her computer off.

The white plush bunny that had been a gift from her crew of five childhood playmates now sat cockily atop her closed diary. Misao smiled as she tweaked the faded pink ribbon tied around its neck and sighed softly. Her diary was left closed for yet another day in her lapse of several weeks. Letting her hair out of the clip again, she stood with the bunny in hand and went to turn out the lights. The girl had an accident free walk back to her bed thanks to the freshly cleared floor, and Misao sank onto the pillows gratefully.

xxxXxxx

Oh my gosh finally! I'm terribly sorry for not updating even after I had finished typing and LK edited for me. I do have a fairly legitimate excuse, like the fact that i couldn't upload documents onto ff dot net but thats okay its all fixed now -is guilty- Both epilogues will be posted now and i also made titles for the chapters like I've been meaning to do for a long time. One more to go!

Dislclaimer: I don't own any of the characters, they all belong to Watsuki-san and um standard disclaimers apply.

i think i didn't put disclaimers on some of the other chapters but im too lazy so! for every chapter that i missed, i don't own any of it except the plotline.


	16. Epilogue: Part II

xxXxx Epilogue: Part II xxXxx

Tired as she was, Misao could not sleep. It was long past midnight, she knew, but something kept her eyes from staying closed. She'd lain in bed staring into the darkness of her ceiling, and given up trying an hour or so ago. Presently, she was seated on the edge of her bed watching the shadows of leaves blow past her window. The flowered curtains hung open and nearby streetlights leaked an orange puddle onto her carpeted floor.

Jiya's kind face smiled at her from her memories. In the space of one day, Misao had said a last good-bye to the man who'd played the guardian's role in her life for as long as she could remember. And then she'd found that she could remember more than she'd ever imagined. A past that had only been remembered through fragments of memories triggered by seemingly random events had been returned to her in one shocking moment. She had been given a lightning fast trip through a life she'd previously known through faded photographs and negligent reminiscing of others. Misao had reclaimed a part of herself that she hadn't even known she'd lost.

At this precise moment in time, Misao remained torn despite Aoshi's earlier consolations. The loss of her grandfather was still acutely fresh in her mind but her heart was more than willing to move away from the pain of loss and into the warmth of new love. Was she being unfilial as a granddaughter, somehow, by wishing she could let go of her family's latest death so soon? With her new look at the past Misao had come to realize just how large a shadow death had cast in the lives of all those who were dear to her. Was she taking her grandfather's death too lightly?

Her mind turned from the dark thoughts of death and pain to the new feeling of being in love. It was nothing like the crushes and blind infatuation of her early teens. The way she _melted_ into Aoshi's arms, the way his voice seemed to make her blood warmer and the firmly reassuring safety in his brief smiles was like nothing she'd ever imagined before. The images of childhood hero and adolescent lover overlapped blurrily in her mind, causing unfamiliar emotions to all but overwhelm the girl.

When Misao finally pushed her tired mind away from its endless contemplation, a striking sense of loneliness washed over her. Wallowing in memories of a dead man made her soul go cold. It would take time to adapt to life without her grandfather, even though he'd been hospitalized for months.

Even still, Misao wouldn't be stopping at the flower shop with Kaoru after school on the way to the hospital anymore. There would be no more phone calls from hospital staff late at night, be it false alarms or serious developments. All the times Misao had run to her grandfather's arms for help and advice were firmly in the past. There would never be the glorious recovery and homecoming that they had all been secretly hoping for somewhere beyond the reach of the rational mind.

Misao stood and crossed the room to her desk, picking up the keys that glinted in the borrowed orange light from outside her window. Turning them over in her hand, she felt the metal warm under her fingers as her heart warmed at the thought of Aoshi. She moved to the window and looked outside. The tear-blurred night Jiya passed away had carried a swollen full moon. Tonight, all that remained was a sliver in the darkness.

Memories of that night brought loneliness to her heart like a clenching fist. Coldness seeped through her very being and tingled in her bones. Her fingers sought out the silver pieces hanging at her neck and remembered warmth hung tantalizingly in the darkness.

"_I wanted you back, Misao. I wanted _my_ Misao-chan, the one who smiled for me and loved me."_

She made her way back to her bed ponderously, turning the conflicts in her heart over and over. As she'd somehow anticipated, the fire in her spirit gravitated towards warmth. She picked up her white bunny in one hand and jingled the keys in the other. Standing quickly and not allowing herself any more opportunity for hesitation, she made her way to the door.

The hallway outside sent a real cold riffling through her nightgown. At this hour, no lights were on in the house but she made her way by instinct to the door at the end of the hall. Her searching fingers found the doorknob and the smaller of the two keys slid in smoothly. With a click, the lock yielded and Misao crossed the threshold into a room she hadn't entered for over ten years.

The silence inside was as strong as the darkness when she closed the door softly. Aoshi's window overlooked the garden and there were no streetlights to soften the deep blackness of night. Her eyes adjusted quickly from dark to darker and she realized with a start that the other occupant of the room was sitting up on the edge of his bed. He did not move or call out to her, but Misao knew he'd heard her come in. She wondered idly if he'd only just heard her coming or if he'd been awake as long as she had.

"Aoshi-sama."

Her tentative whisper hung in the silence before the tall young man stood from his place at the other end of the room. He stepped through the darkness faster than she could anticipate and his arms were around her before she could react.

"Are you cold, Misao?"

She shook her head in his chest, letting the hand with the plush bunny fall to her side. His warmth was even better now than she had remembered from before. Aoshi murmured something and guided her to the far end of the room. Misao let her fingers brush over the bed frames of the two long-unoccupied beds as they passed, then slipped the keys into her nightgown pocket.

"Thanks," Misao said softly as Aoshi sat her down on his bed beside him, drawing the blanket around her shoulders.

"Taking good care of my girlfriend is my responsibility, right?"

She couldn't tell if he was teasing.

"Mmm…can I…can I stay with you?"

"Give me a moment." He left her side and she watched him move to the bed beside the one she presently occupied. With a slight amount of effort, he pushed that bed to line up with his.

"Ano…"

"Yes you can stay." Aoshi's voice came again as he crawled up behind her over the adjoined beds. "Would you rather sleep on Beshimi's bed? Take your pick."

Misao smiled in the dark. "Your bed here is fine. I've already warmed up the blanket."

She felt like the little girl she had been all those years ago when the man who'd gone from hero to lover for her tucked her into bed. A fierce blush heated her cheeks when he brushed her bangs aside to press a chaste kiss to her forehead. The familiar gesture that had been so comforting now made her yearn for more. And just like she remembered, Aoshi had a kiss for her white bunny too.

"Are you sure this is okay?" Misao asked somewhat timidly as Aoshi made himself comfortable on the bed his brother had slept on. In answer, he reached across the space between them and drew her towards him. She moved willingly, pressing against his chest with a familiarity that made her heart ache in a nice sort of way. His warmth filled up the void in her heart again and his arms were gentle around her.

"I love you," Misao shifted to meet his gaze in the darkness. Simple words she'd said almost by rote as a child returned with a deeper meaning.

"I love you too," a gentle kiss hovered on her lips with promises for the future. "Now go to sleep."

Far too tired to complain about the slightly patronizing tone he'd taken on in the latter statement, Misao found her way back to the pillow she'd been given and closed her eyes. The plush bunny's soft head nestled against her cheek and she felt the silver pieces settle into the hollow at the base of her throat as if they belonged there.

"Oyasumi." She reached across and their hands met in the middle, fingers falling in place without a thought.

"Oyasumi nasai, dear Misao."

xxxXxxx

DONEEEEE thank you so much LK i love you -glomps- and TheUniverseBeyond thank you for all your input and support I really appreciate it. I hope you'll keep in touch in the future cuz I'm not done writing yet! hehe im so silly. anyways this has been a really good experience for me even though I sort of broke my "regular updates" rule for myself, and I do feel bad for it. I hope you can all forgive me, and I hope I haven't sucked too much in writing so many chapters.

Er yeah and check the chapter titles too! I actually wasted alot of time thinking them up. Alot of them are song names (yes I'm quite un-creative) and on that note I don't own any of the song titles, they all belong to respective artists. And the song itself doesn't necessarily reflect the chapter, its only the title that I liked :D

And that's it! Thank you to everybody who bore with me till now and..there probably aren't many but that's okay I appreciate every review I get. -glomps everybody-

Disclaimer: I don't own any of the Rurouni Kenshin characters, they all belong to Watsuki-san.


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